You Can Never Go Home Again
by Crystal Child
Summary: Naruto was going to be gone for a week, so why did it take an entire year, instead? How different are the people he left behind? How different is he? Can he ever really go back to the place he called home and the people he called family NaruSasuNaru
1. Take What's Yours and Leave The Rest

**A/N 9/1/12:** So, I've taken such a long break from this story, I've all but forgotten parts that I'm pretty damn sure are critical, and I really want to get back into writing it again. So, to remind myself, I've started the task of editing and reformatting chapters. Especially the first few, which had such wonky and confusing formats.

**Changes to Chapter:**

-Team size was originally written as 5 boys + Naruto, has been reduced to 4 + Naruto. Team mates are now: Konohamaru, Toshio, Sigume, Mizuo. The fifth boy was never mentioned again, so I'm just removing him.

-Italicized 'past' parts, this was the only chapter without the italics.

-Minor grammar edits.

If it's your first time to the story, welcome! Enjoy! For those coming back, hi again!

**You Can Never Go Home Again  
Chapter One: Take What's Yours And Leave The Rest**

It was never meant to be a year-long mission. He was never supposed to have strayed that far from the village, nor wound up in Sand territory for that long. He was supposed to have been home a week from the day he left, at the most. A _week_. Instead, it'd been exactly 362 days since he'd seen Konoha's gates. He stilled on a tree branch, studying the tall wooden doors and the village that tugged at his heart, despite the hate that rested in the people.

He'd grown quite a bit in the year; all the movement and vicious weather he'd endured had left him a lean, built, 6' eighteen year-old young man. His blonde hair had grown a little too long, so he'd given himself a make-shift haircut with a kunai about a week ago. Shinobi didn't need to worry about how good their hair looked when they were on the run, hiding from frustrating enemies he couldn't see but knew were there. He hid his obvious, sunshine hair with the hood of his knee-length jacket, currently hanging open and blowing around his dark blue pants and black tank shirt in the breeze.

The Kyuubi stirred a little in him, sent a tingle down his spine. He smiled (yes, we're here, no you can't destroy it all, now quit asking.) and rose from his crouch, eyes sweeping out. _Kind of lax on security, aren't you, Tsunade-baba?_ He spotted two ANBU near the doors, hidden, and the four that guarded the gate. _Oh well, guess I might as well be civilized about my entrance…be a little out of character._

He leapt down, landing on a knee and a foot, and rose, dusting himself off, before he walked towards the guards, who immediately stiffened at his presence. (No, you can't eat them….because I don't want to eat a human!) He smiled happily at them as he approached.

"Halt." That voice alone made him freeze. It commanded he obey or he'd loose a few limbs. But it wasn't that which intimidated him. It was that he recognized it. He blinked in surprise as an ANBU made himself known, cold white mask staring at him, eyes shadowed. But it didn't matter, a breeze blew and Kyuubi caught a whiff of that scent, not that he needed the fox-demon's help. He could recognize that stature, could feel those cold eyes glaring in to him. It made him feel small and insignificant, even now. Just like always. "State your purpose."

Naruto smirked, whiskers crinkling on his cheeks, simply faded scars now, harder to see. "I'm returning home from a mission."

The ANBU was silent for a moment. _That's right, analyze the situation. Am I speaking the truth? Hurry up, though, I don't know how long I can behave myself…_(I thought I told you to shut up, fox, I'm busy.) "State your name."

He smirked, "Jeeze, teme, you can't even recognize an old teammate?"

The ANBU froze, head jerking up a little, hand dropping from its position near a weapon. The figure took a step forward, then lifted its hand and tore off the white mask, "N…Naruto?!"

The newcomer sighed and swept his hood back with a tired smile, "Tadaima. I know I'm late but…Happy Birthday, Sasuke-kun."

* * *

"_And you can't be late!" The pink haired 17 year old cried, "And remember to bring Sasuke-kun something!"_

_Naruto yawned and waved a hand vaguely at her, "Yada yada yada. Why do I need to be there? Sasuke-teme doesn't deserve any presents."_ Not to mention I don't have the money for any at the moment anyway.

"_Oh, come on, Naruto, don't be such a spoil-sport." Sakura Haruno fluffed her hair a little and crossed her arms, giving him a slight glare, "It's his birthday! You only turn 17 once."_

_Naruto rolled his eyes, "You said that last year, too. I went then, didn't have much fun, went home early. Why should I show up for one of your lame parties you know he isn't going to like anyway? You KNOW he's just going to tell you where you can shove that cake…"_

"_Naruto! Don't be so rude! Sasuke-kun already knows about this party!"_

_The blonde blinked, "He does? And you're not dead from his glare yet?"_

_She smirked, "Been around him long enough to develop immunity, just like you, thank you very much."_

_Naruto closed blue eyes for a moment, then opened them again, frown still on his lips, "No thanks. I won't be able to make it anyway. Tsunade-baba's sending me out on a mission."_

"_Naruto!"_

"_Don't whine to me about it. The hag's the one who assigned it to me, take it up with her."_

"_Can't you be back in time for it?"_

"_No."_

"_Naruto!"_

"_Be quiet, Sakura, you're getting annoying."_

_Sakura stuck her tongue out at him. The blonde rolled his eyes and responded in kind, then turned away, "I'm busy, Sakura-chan. I'll see you when I get back, okay?"_

_He grinned and walked away._

"_NARUTO!"_

_A backwards wave without a backwards glance, and then the tall blonde boy was gone, lost in the crowds._

* * *

"So will you take me to Tsunade-baba or are we just going to stand around here staring at each other all day? Coz, I mean, I don't know about you, but frankly if I was gone for this long and just got home, I'd certainly want to get debriefing over with and get some well deserved rest."

The black-haired shinobi blinked wide black eyes, then nodded sheepishly, pulling his ANBU mask back on to his head, positioning it at the side of his head so Naruto could still see his face, and smirked a little, "I suppose that's true, dobe. Although I'm sure she wouldn't want to see your ugly mug at any time."

"Well then we'll just make the visit short and sweet. And don't call me dobe, teme."

Sasuke stared at him for a moment longer, making him slightly unnerved by how relaxed those dark eyes were and was that _happiness_ he saw in those depths? No, just a misunderstanding. Naruto had never really been able to read Sasuke's face all that well.

And then the mask was slipped back over those pale features and the ANBU returned, leading the arrival to the Hokage's building for a long-overdue meeting.

* * *

_July. God, what a hot and sticky time of year. He made a face. And that damn Uchiha-bastard's birthday just happened to be this month, in a few days, even. How the hell had the ice-prince not melted the day he was born? Would have made Naruto's jobs a lot easier…or harder…whatever._

_He wrinkled his nose and wished once again that he hadn't been so stubborn and brought out the bright orange jacket. Too fucking hot for it, anyways. And why the hell did the old hag want to see him anyway? He'd much rather be out kicking Sasuke's ass or sitting around in the cool darkness of his apartment. He grumbled under his breath and climbed the long path, feet dragging, to the Hokage's office, lifting a slow fist to knock lazily, then went in without waiting for a reply._

_Tsunade was sitting at her desk, one of her long blonde ponytails falling over her shoulder, as she glared at a scroll sprawled out in front of her. Naruto cleared his throat to get her attention, rolling his eyes, "You know, Tsunade-baba, no guards posted at the door and you so focused on glaring holes through that paper, someone could just waltz in and take something."_

_Tsunade frowned, "Some days, I'm willing to hand over the title of Hokage to the next person who walks through the door."_

"_AWW! But that would have been me! You should have! It would have made it sooooo much easier on me!"_

_The blonde woman rolled her eyes and set her scroll aside, face turning serious, "You're all set?"_

"_Hai. I'll be leaving not long after sunset tonight."_

"_Can you put it off until tomorrow morning?"_

_He quirked an eyebrow at her, blue eyes studying her seriously, "…why?"_

_She smirked, "Seems the escort's requested an entire team."_

"_Dumb bi—"_

"_Naruto!" The boy shut up, "It hurts to tell you, but she's requested a team to go with, to…um…"_

"_Make sure the Demon Kid doesn't go all Demon on their ass." Naruto sank into a chair and crossed his arms over his chest, pouting slightly._

"_I wasn't going to put it so crudely…"_

"_Oh, don't worry, Tsunade-baba, I'm used to it by now. Come on, seventeen years of it, you'd think I'd be used to hearing it by now."_

"_Naruto…" Tsunade looked a little hurt for him. There was a knock on the door at that moment, and Konohamaru and three other boys Naruto didn't recognize appeared at the door, looking a little nervous about interrupting, except for Konohamaru who flashed his broad smile at his 'older brother' and stood patiently by, waiting for acknowledgement._

_He sighed and shrugged, moving to rise, "Alright, so I'll get Sasuke and Sakura and we can be ready to…" His voice trailed off as Tsunade shook her head._

"_I'm sorry, Naruto, they won't be part of this mission. Instead…" she trailed off, eyes turning towards Konohamaru._

_Naruto turned slowly, eyeing them all, before shaking his head, "Oh-hohohoooo, no. No way. I'm not taking this bunch of…"_

"_Naruto, it's not a request."_

"_What am I going to do with four kids?!"_

_Tsunade smirked, "Learn what it was all about for Kakashi when he had to handle you." Naruto scowled, "Besides," she continued, "That jounin vest isn't doing much good in the closet."_

_Naruto's face fell even more. As if he needed to be reminded. After all these years, Team 7 still wasn't doing too hot in advancing, so far he'd been the only one to make it past chuunin, although he'd requested his advancement remain between himself, Tsunade, Iruka and Kakashi. It was hard keeping the secret from his friends; especially Sasuke who had become…something that he wasn't quite sure how to label as of late. He gave of weird signals, did odd things, they'd even…kissed…a few times; which was normally followed by days of awkward arguments and silences. It all made his head hurt, and at the moment, he should just stop thinking about it coz he was going to overload his brain if he kept this train of thought going._

"_Naruto."_

_He turned cerulean eyes up to his leader, face blank._

_Tsunade smiled, "It's only for a week. Let's see how much of a leader you really are."_

* * *

"Where's the rest of your team?"

"Not even a hello?" Naruto smiled and unzipped his vest, letting the cool breeze coming in through the window wash over him. Sasuke stood silently behind him, near the door. Ice-prince, as always.

Tsunade frowned at him from over her desk, "Hello, where the hell is your team?"

Naruto waved a hand towards the window, "They're coming, they're coming. Just cleaning up behind ourselves. You're looking as young as ever, Tsunade-baba."

There was a moment where the woman quirked an eyebrow and studied him, took in his entire changed form, and then she was in front of him in an instant and he couldn't breathe, being squashed against her in a monster hug.

"Idiot! Not even a report from you for months! We were sure you were dead!" Naruto coughed a little in response, but could do nothing to defend himself as she continued to deprive him of air, "Do you realize how worried everyone was?"

Finally, she let go, holding him at arms length. He laughed slightly, "I doubt everyone was worried, baba. After so many months, people start to stop caring."

Tsunade's eyes sharpened, glared at him, and he could feel the Uchiha's eyes on his back, but neither said anything. It was silent for a long moment, then the curtains moved and there was another presence in the room. Sasuke's hand immediately went to his weapons, kunai finding its way to his fingers.

Naruto waved a hand, breaking away from Tsunade's hold, and turned to the newcomer, "Finish everything?"

"Hai." He stood near the window, wearing all black, hair hidden under a headband, Konoha symbol glittering on metal around his neck, "The others are waiting below."

Naruto smiled and turned to Tsunade, "Told you so."

Tsunade made a frustrated noise, but smiled back, and retreated to her desk. "Come back tomorrow, I'm sure you're tired. I'll debrief you then."

"Yes, ma'am." Naruto bowed, so did his follower, and he made his own retreat to the hallways, feeling Sasuke pressed near his shoulder. He smiled, comforted by the presence, and glided down the hall, thoughts filled with the idea of a hot shower.

* * *

"_Dobe."_

_He had an instant to react, not really knowing what to expect, turning towards the voice that had fallen to a dangerously low pitch, and suddenly finding himself pressed to the wall, one arm pinned at the side of his head. He smirked, "Hello, teme."_

_Uchiha studied him, dark and brooding, eyes hard and unreadable. He was a sense of beauty Naruto hardly could believe was real. If he hadn't grown up with the boy, he'd have thought he was some kind of god. Maybe of Ice. Or sex…coz he dripped with sex appeal, even though he never showed interest in anyone._

Except you_._ _The thought made him shiver a little._

_Sasuke was leaning close to him, he could feel the boy's breath teasing his skin, warm and soft, a little fast. His demon fox-strengthened hearing could easily pick up the beat of his heart, a faster beat than normal._

"_Something bothering you?" He asked, hoping his voice didn't break and tried to keep it from falling to that low tone that would match Sasuke's and urge him on. God…those lips were so close…_

"_Yeah…something. You're leaving?"_

_Naruto rolled his eyes, "For a week. If this is about your party, Sakura already made me promise to—"_

"_It's not about the party." Was that a_ snarl _in Sasuke's voice? Naruto's eyes narrowed, and flashed a warning Sasuke ignored. "You can't go." His voice seemed to break, suddenly soft and sad and surprised Naruto, "Something doesn't feel right. I don't like it, stay, send someone else."_

_Naruto laughed softly and reached up with his free hand, slipping fingers into that silky black hair and pulling Sasuke's head down, planting a kiss on his forehead, "You worry too much, it's just a week, I'll be back before you know it."_

"_You promise?"_

"_You're really worried about this, aren't you?"_

_Sasuke's forehead dropped to Naruto's shoulder, and he felt the boy sigh, "I just have this terrible feeling…you should stay…"_

"_I'm shinobi, I do what I'm told to by the Hokage." He put his hand on Sasuke's shoulder and pushed him back a little, "I'll try and be back for your birthday, okay? And if I'm late, we'll celebrate on our own."_

_Sasuke stared at him for a moment, his cold mask firmly in place, rendering him unreadable. For an instant, Naruto was worried Sasuke was going to dart off and demand someone take his place, but relaxed when the stare softened again and the ebony-haired boy nodded. "I'm going to hold you to that, then."_

_He leaned forward, capturing Naruto's lips in his own, briefly, then pulled back, black eyes meeting startled blue. He smirked, "Just sealing the promise with a kiss."_

"_You're not gonna ignore me now, then are you?" Naruto's voice was slightly sarcastic, and he smiled as Sasuke's cheeks tinged just a slight pink._

_Naruto rolled his eyes and pulled Sasuke back in for one more moment of intimate contact, arm locked tight around Sasuke's neck as he opened himself up just a tiny bit to his rival/best friend._

* * *

Ch. 1 Fin.

**Original A/N: **So? Have I totally and utterly confused you yet? I hope not, I'm trying to figure out the best way to lay this out, because the story is planned at the moment to jump from the past to the present at every scene change (with a few exceptions, of course). Thanks for reading!


	2. It's Only You

**9/2/12 Changes To Chapter:**

-Bolded Kyuubi's words…how exciting.

-There was one more mention of the team of 5. Reduced to 4.

**You Can Never Go Home Again  
Chapter Two: It's Only You**

"Well, _this_ seems familiar." Naruto smiled at the raven-haired man currently in front of him, although the gesture didn't reach his eyes, "Picking up where we left off, Sasuke-_kun_?" He sarcastically added the ending that he knew made the other boy…well…man…irritated.

Mission successful as the grip currently imposed on Naruto's wrists, pinning them both against the wall, tightened and a low growl issued from behind the ANBU mask.

"You know, it doesn't quite work the same with the mask staring me down." He smirked with pride as another growl issued, then winced as his hands were crushed back against the wall.

"Shut up, Uzumaki." Sasuke's voice hissed at him, uncurling in a disturbing way, muffled by the white plate that hid Sasuke's familiar features. Vaguely, Naruto wondered if Sasuke was going to remove the mask so they could study each other openly, or if he was going to have to hand the other nin his ass and take it off himself. (No, you can't do that…I don't care…I said no, didn't I?)

The blonde's mind drifted, and he opened his mouth to repeat a phrase almost forgotten in his memory, "Something bothering you?"

Sasuke seemed a little caught off-guard by the words, and tensed. "Yeah, you. Did you mean what you said back there?"

"Which part? That the others were waiting?" The grip increased and he winced, "Okay! Okay! Jeeze, no sense of humor at all."

"It all kind of died out a year ago."

Naruto frowned, then stuck his tongue out, "You never had a sense of humor to begin with."

"I'd watch what I do with that tongue if I was you."

Naruto had the upper hand in this conversation, he knew he did. Yeah, sure, he was pinned to the wall, but details, details. "You can't do anything about it, Uchiha, hiding behind that mask. You won't even meet me eye-to-eye and you're warning me what I should be doing with my _tongue_?"

Sasuke's grip released, surprising the sunshine blonde. Fingers traced the curve of his neck, and the part of his collarbone exposed by the open vest. "You shouldn't say careless things about people in general." The hands traced back up, feeling Naruto's pulse rise just slightly, "It's not so easy for people to just 'stop caring'."

And then he was gone, and Uzumaki Naruto rubbed his neck gingerly, glancing around. He cursed Sasuke's speed and forced himself to continue on, determined not to be interrupted from his course again.

* * *

_He left Sasuke for a few hours of restless sleep. Tossing, he was met with the barriers in his mind, the demon that shed himself onto every aspect of Naruto's life. The part of himself he hated and was forced to accept._

_The Kyuubi hissed, fanning out the glorious nine fire-colored tails as best it could in its cage. Unintimidated, Naruto slumped down against the bar, glaring up at the beast. "Oh come off it, you already know I don't care, Kyuubi. You don't intimidate me THAT much."_

_Fangs bared themselves, and the low voice curled out to him, "**I should. I've killed stronger than you**."_

"_Then why are you still in that cage?"_

_The demon was quiet, watching him with angry, angry eyes._

_Naruto sighed and looked up at the demon, "Look, I'm not here to fight with you. It's going to be time for you to pay your rent soon."_

_Kyuubi looked interested, "**Blood needs spilling?**"_

"_You don't need to get excited, I don't know yet. But Sasuke—" The demon hissed, not liking the name one bit, "…__**Sasuke**__ said something didn't feel right, and honestly, I'm sharing the same thoughts, so just be ready." He rose, floated a little above the floor and met red eyes with his own, "Anything could happen, and I promised him I'd be home for his birthday."_

_The demon shifted and made a gruff sound, then gave its thought on the whole thing by turning around and flopping down, tails fanning out and leaving Naruto with the view of the demon's ass._

_The dream faded, as Naruto was drawn back to the world of the living. He pulled himself out of bed, stretching and going through the morning exercises, before heading for the shower that could quite possibly be his last in days, if not forever._

* * *

He hissed in sharp pain as hot water struck his worn, sunburned skin. It'd been too long since he'd been able to do what he was doing now; standing under a stream of water in the local bathhouse. He scrubbed gently at his arm, forcing himself not to think about the lack of scars there.

It didn't matter that he was the only one who returned with such smooth skin. His mind was scarred enough to make up for it. Blonde hair became a little brighter as he scrubbed out the months of dirt he'd collected. There had never been time for a proper bath, when the opportunity could present itself in Sand territory…which hadn't been often. He and his ragged band of youth had to indulge in short sand baths, which never left anyone feeling cleaner, although it did tend to warm them up a little.

Naruto shivered and turned, water spraying his face. He ducked his head down, watching as the water ran down his body to the drain in the ground. After several long minutes of standing there, clearing his mind and watching tendrils of almost invisible red chakra lace up and down his body, he reached out and cut the valve for the water, immediately shivering as the afternoon air swept over his damp body.

Naruto stepped back from the showerhead, smiling a little to himself about nothing, and headed for the baths, to do what he hadn't done in ages: simply sit and do nothing at all.

"_Aaaaaalright, men!" Naruto's cheery voice called out in the early morning hours. He stretched his arms and cracked his knuckles, "Are we ready?"_

_He was greeted with a mumbled reply from the four sleepy youngsters. His shoulders fell and he looked a little disappointed._

"_Oh, come on, guys! Aren't you the LEAST bit excited?"_

"_Too early, Naruto-niichan."_

_Naruto glared at Konohamaru, then at the other three, growled a little, then shouldered his back, "Fine, fine, let's just get going then."_

"_We should make formation." One of them said, stilling Naruto in mid-step. The blonde turned, looking at the one who'd spoken. He was a little taller than the rest, skinny as a twig, with short, spiky brown hair. He was wearing what all the others wore, black slightly baggy pants and a long-sleeved black shirt, which he had tugged up the sleeves, revealing white bindings that started at the wrist and vanished under the sleeve._

_Naruto eyed him, "And which one are you?"_

"_Sigume." He stated simply, looking a little bored as he shifted from one foot to the other._

_Naruto nodded, "Then, Sigume, you're in charge of formations."_

_The boy's dark eyes widened for a moment, clearly surprised, but then they narrowed and he nodded sharply, "Sir."_

"_Naruto!" The blonde turned sharply at the sound of his name. Tsunade. She was strolling towards him with something in her arms. Shit. He could recognize what she was carrying from a mile away. He smiled anyway, as she approached, "Getting a nice early start, I see."_

"_I want to make good time, I told Sasuke I'd be back for his birthday."_

_Tsunade nodded and held out the object. He stared at it for a moment, then reached out gingerly._

"_It's not going to bite you, you know."_

_Naruto glared at her, "It very well could." She released her hold on the item and he felt the full weight of it settle in his hand. The vest's rough texture reminded him of the day he first received it, in the shadows instead of a great ceremony, such as this early morning departure. Nothing grand for the self-proclaimed future Rokudaime. He gave Tsunade a weak smile, "I guess…thanks." And pulled it on._

_Tsunade smiled as she watched the youth zip up the vest all the way to the top, then leaned over and removed his hitai-ate from his forehead, and bent, placing a gentle kiss there, before pulling back._

_Naruto blushed a little and rubbed the back of his neck, glancing over his shoulder as his 'soldiers' who stared for a moment then bowed their heads and discussed amongst themselves, Sigume leading the conversations. Tsunade smiled at them all then back at Naruto, "Wait here for a moment." She vanished with his headband._

_Naruto frowned, where the hell was that old woman going with his hitai-ate?_

_The answer returned after a few brief moments, when he had returned to his team and was pretending to analyze the formation they'd come up with. He turned his attention back to her, and came to her when she gestured._

"_Close your eyes." She spoke, smiling reassuringly. He let them slip closed, and felt something cool touch his forehead, "So you don't forget where you belong." The headband fell onto his forehead over the object, "So you don't forget where you will return to."_

_Naruto opened his eyes when he felt her shift backwards, and reached up to touch his forehead, pausing when she shook her head, and let his hand drop back to his side. He nodded in understanding, and she retreated without another word, vanishing into the shadows._

_The sky was beginning to glow a soft purple. The sun._

"_Come on, let's get going, we've been held back long enough, we're being waited for."_

_The others nodded in agreement and leapt for the gates. Naruto paused, feeling eyes on him, and turned, lifting his head towards the Uchiha manor, catching sight of blackness in the trees. He smiled, seeing the glint of black eyes, and lifted a hand in farewell, before turning and following the others._

* * *

Cool evening air swept through the Hidden Village of the Leaf as a freshly-clean Naruto dropped onto his butt on a branch, dangling one leg over the side and propping the other one out in front of him. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, looking out at the city as lights began flickering on in homes and off in businesses. He leaned back against the trunk, a dreamy smile crossing his lips.

Home. It was just like he remembered. So painfully the same.

_We are the only ones who have changed, aren't we? Here, everything is just as it should be, nothing warped, nothing different._ (Quiet, I'm trying to enjoy the moment…yes, it is pretty, isn't it? I…huh? What? Where?)

The air changed, took on a scent of vanilla and cool steel. Naruto shifted, brought his arm up. _There._ His hand shot out, grabbed at the night, wrapped around hard steel that pierced his flesh.

Blue eyes glowed with a slight flash of red, and he turned in the direction the kunai had come from. He smirked.

"I saw you coming a mile away, Uchiha."

Sasuke dropped down from the shadows to his left. Naruto scowled.

"Oh yes, I can see that, and your sense of direction hasn't changed, I see also."

"Shut up, teme, I'm tired."

Naruto leaned back again, loosening his grasp on the weapon and watching as the blood retreated back into the wound. It was like watching time rewind and he always wished that it could all go backwards, back to the way it was. He raised his eyes and wiped his hand on his pants as Sasuke landed in a crouch on the branch, shaking it a little.

Naruto took the moment to study him. Time had treated the Uchiha well, he seemed to have lost a bit of weight, but Naruto could still see the muscles in the thin arms. He was wearing black shorts with white bindings around his ankles, and a black tanktop. Naruto raised an eyebrow as he noted Sasuke's hitai-ate was missing from his forehead, but the eyebrow sank back down as he studied the beauty that had overtaken the planes of his face. His cheeks had narrowed a bit, all signs of baby fat completely gone, and the nose looked a little more pronounced. The hair and the eyes, though, were just as he remembered. Especially the eyes, when he was finally forced to meet them.

It seemed he wasn't the only one studying the effects of time. Those cold eyes met his and sent electricity through him. They were so dull looking, so lifeless. But that was the mask, and Naruto still remembered how to look beyond it. Not far, but just barely beyond. He didn't understand what he was seeing, anyways.

A thin, pale hand reached out and took hold of the kunai Naruto still held, "Come on, let's spar."

Naruto's thin lips curved into a smile, "Alright, Sasuke-bastard, let's see how good the ANBU have made you."

"However good I am, I did myself." _Without you,_ was the unspoken comment that left hanging in the air and stung a little bit at Naruto. But that was alright, he figured he deserved it.

Besides, he was planning on showing Sasuke just how much _he'd_ learned in the past year.

(And I don't need your help, Kyuubi.)

* * *

_The man and woman who had requested their escort were nobility in the Lightning Country, and had been forced to remain in Konoha for three months longer than planned. Needless to say, the couple had been very anxious to head out and made as best time as possible._

_What none of them had counted on, however, was that the weather would take such a terrible turn for the worse. Two days into their journey, miles from civilization, a downpour had begun, ripping open the sky with thunder and lightening and torrential rains. They'd been forced to seek first higher-ground, and then shelter when the rain hadn't let up after two hours._

_The group slumped into a cave, pushing the couple to the back of it once it had been checked and cleared for safety. The ninja set themselves at the entrance, creating a semi-circle around the couple, who shivered as cold air settled amongst them._

"_I'll get wood." One of the nin rose, and headed for the exit. _Toshio_, his mind provided Naruto with the name. With long black hair in a loose ponytail, from the back he almost reminded Naruto of a certain Hyuuga. Almost. But he was too thin, not as developed and didn't carry the same pride/angst in his step. Naruto let him go, and a few seconds later, Sigume followed, and he lost sight of them as the mist and rain became a wall._

"_Hopefully they'll find their way back safely." Konohamaru spoke in a quiet voice, curling his legs up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them, "I mean…it wouldn't do to lose them both."_

_Naruto nodded and glanced over at the couple._

_They were in their thirties, he guessed, both dressed for travel in loose garments and a few bags. They didn't like him, and he returned the discomfort, which was made a little worse by the fact that they insisted there be no horses or carriages and everyone would move by foot, saying they could make better time and there weren't enough possessions in the Hidden Village for them to need something that big when they could carry it all on their backs._

_They huddled together, looking like a mass of one person. He didn't bother to learn and remember their names. They didn't address him, so he wouldn't bring attention to them. It was a rather nice, mutual understanding._

_His stomach rumbled and he dug into his pack, pulling out a ration bar and taking a quiet bite out of the hard, chewy substance that didn't taste much better than a chunk of wood. Darkness was quickly settling outside, he noted, and grew more worried with each bit of time that passed, until finally, there was movement._

_Toshio and Sigume slipped back into the cave's small entrance, bowing to make it through, and dumped a pile of wood in the center. Naruto frowned, there wasn't enough ventilation to get a fire going in the cave and not kill them all._

"_This isn't going to work." He stated, "The smoke has no where to go."_

_Toshio stood silently for a moment, studying the cave, then slipped over to the wall. Naruto lifted an eyebrow and watched him form a few seals with his hands and slap them against the rough surface. He rubbed his nose when he smelled the hint of blood._

_The cave groaned in protest to whatever jutsu the black-haired man was performing. The couple huddled together a little closer. There was suddenly a crackling noise and the whole cavern shook, dirt and small stones falling on their heads. When Naruto dared open his eyes again, Toshio was kneeling beside him, reaching out to arrange the wood. The blonde leaned back, propping his weight up on his hands behind himself, and looked up. There, barely noticeable, was a hole, high up in the roof, about the size of two of his fists._

"_Is that enough?" He questioned._

_No one replied._

* * *

Weapons clashed and glittered in the moonlight. Sweat poured down his forehead, and Naruto felt some slip down his back under his shirt, making him shiver as he launched himself off a tree, kunai raised, to meet Sasuke head-on, who had made a similar move.

_This. This is what I've missed._ They fell apart again, the simple dance of their one-on-one battle going through the steps. Chests heaving, they watched for a moment of weakness. Waited for that instant when opportunity would present itself.

Naruto made the next move, going in for the kill.

* * *

"_Come at me with the intent to kill, or you'll never succeed." The storm had moved on in the morning, and they were far behind schedule. However, the woman had come down with a fever and they stopped at a stream to give her time to rest and bathe away the fever. Naruto spun easily out of a strike, bringing up his arm to block a kick aimed at his head. He smirked. Two against him, and still he was barely working a sweat._

_They'd been at it for almost an hour and a half, when there came a sudden silence, everyone stilling, stiffening. He had sensed it first, had ended their spar with one sudden snap, and had straightened, signaling the end. They must have understood his silent command, and shifted towards the man and woman._

_He stretched out his hearing, listened for anything…_anything_. But there was nothing, no sounds but the water flowing in the stream. His fingers went to his case and withdrew shuriken, as he sank down into a guarded stance._

"_Whooo." Naruto frowned. An owl? He turned slowly, arm lifting to guard his blind side. But nothing happened. A white owl watched them, unblinking. He took a step backwards. _

"_I'm thinking…" he stated slowly, backing himself towards the couple, eyes remaining locked on the animal, "That we can't stay here. We'll have to carry her. And move quickly."_

* * *

Sasuke spun, sharingan eyes glowing brightly.

"Cheater." Naruto muttered as he landed, sliding backwards and using his hand in the dirt to stop the movement.

Sasuke smirked, "Come on, dobe, is this all you've got?"

Naruto snarled and launched.

(No, I do NOT need your help. I can beat the…freaking bastard on my own!)

One arm drew up in a block over his weak point, his neck and heart, while the other pulled back, kunai catching the light of the moon. He gave a sharp battle cry and did the unexpected, landing and launching himself into the air, catching Sasuke off guard.

The Uchiha tried to prepare, head shooting up, mouth open slightly, in surprise. His feet shifted and he brought his center of balance lower, but still, it wasn't enough.

_That's right, bastard. Surprise!_

He changed the angle of the blade seconds before it could pierce Sasuke's shoulder in a deadly move, and instead tore through the shoulder of the shirt, and took the black-haired boy down with his own body weight.

They landed with a loud noise and a puff of dirt thrown in the air. Naruto pressed one knee into the ground, hovering over Sasuke, panting. He stared down at him as the dirt settled, blue eyes clashing with red that was fading back to black. Strength left him a little and he slouched a little bit, perched over Sasuke, rear end barely applying pressure against Sasuke's stomach.

There was that infernal smirk. _Damn him._ Naruto sat back, wiping some sweat off his forehead, "I win."

"Yay, one in a million."

Naruto glared ineffectively, "Shut up."

The night breeze cooled the sweat on their skins as they sat like that for a long time, watching each other but pretending not to. Somewhere, there was an annoying nighthawk, making a screeching noise every few seconds.

Naruto felt Sasuke's muscles go lax, and brought his full attention to him, frowning, "What?"

"Welcome home."

Ch. 2 Fin.

**Original A/N: **Wow…okay, so I was going to keep going, but my brain died, I spent about 3 ½ hours writing this, got to the last two scenes and my brain faltered, went and played DDR for a little while, came back and forced out the last two parts.


	3. He Calls the Mansion Not a House But a T...

**9/2/12 A/N: **I remember this chapter well. The introduction of a character I TOTALLY hadn't planned on, who's become an important part of the story. Won't go into details, for the people who haven't read the story yet, so enjoy!

-Just minor edits

**Original A/N:** I am a lazy bum. Yes, I know. I love you, too.

For the people in the sasuxnaru IRC room who have been nagging me for more. I really love you guys. Mainly, the chapter's a (very late) present for Koo-chan...happy birthday!

Warning: I turned Sasuke into a pansy later on in the chapter…sorry…;;

**You Can Never Go Home Again  
Chapter Three: He Calls the Mansion Not a House but a Tomb**

_The first hint that there was more to the mission than an escort came when Konohamaru suffered the first injury. It was early in the morning, the day before Sasuke's birthday, and the group had been on the move for hours. The weather was beautiful, the sun bursting from the brilliant blue sky, the temperature was already at comfortable levels, which promised that the noon-hours would be sweltering hot._

_Uzumaki Naruto called for a break, noticing the Lady was looking paler and the Lord looking ready to drop as he moved._

What wimps. Obviously not ninja._ He put his hands on his hips and looked around. They were nearing the edge of the forests. He knew, because the trees were thinning out and the uneasy feeling of exposure was settling. He couldn't help smiling, however, at the blue sky. Finally a nice day. They could cover some serious ground if the couple could hold out._

_His team spread out, lazing about, tossing insults and humor around between them. However a keen eye could tell they were strategically placed to cover weaknesses. Konohamaru, shouting a rude comment at one of the other team members, wandered to the couple at the center of their protection, crouched down and offered them some bread before meandering back to his spot. Naruto was quite pleased with the way the others shifted their attention to include the weak spot Konohamaru created when he had his back to the trees. He couldn't help smiling again before stretching and turning his back on the group, peering out into the woods in the direction they would be heading._

_It was about then the woods fell silent again. It settled so quickly, it was impossible not to notice. Naruto's figure fell automatically to a defensive stance, eyes gliding around, searching for trouble._

"_Naruto-niichan?"_

"_Shh…" Naruto's hand fell to his pouch, finger finding the hole in the handle of the kunai. He drew the weapon slowly._

"_Whooo?" Everyone reacted to the shrill noise. Naruto's cerulean eyes focused on the bird, again the white owl. He growled at it, frowning when he was unable to pick up a scent, even with his fox-demon heightened abilities. The bird was only a few feet away to his right. It tilted its head, beady black eyes staring curiously at him and asked it's question again, voice cold and high, "Whooo?"_

"_Naru—"_

"_Shh!"_

_The owl's head turned abruptly and focused on the speaker. It bobbed its head and moved down the branch, eyes locked on Konohamaru._

"_Whooo?"_

Stupid damn bird._ Naruto frowned as he felt the Kyuubi shift uncomfortably (What? Don't ignore me…Yeah, something's not right with it. No, we won't eat it. That's disgusting…go back to sleep.)_

_The bird puffed up and rotated his head to stare at Naruto. That's when the sense of something very VERY wrong settled. Before he could move, the bird took flight._

* * *

"Where are you going?"

Naruto turned, tired blue eyes meeting twin black abysses, "I'm tired, I'm going to go find a place to sleep."

The Uchiha quirked an eyebrow, "You don't have a place to go?"

Naruto shrugged, "Gone a bit too long for my old apartment to still be mine. Missed payments for…what, 12 months now? That's what you get for going on a year long, unannounced vacation." He noticed the frown that settled on Sasuke's face and quickly waved his hand, "Don't make that face, I'll find someplace."

"C'mon."

The blonde frowned, "I don't need pity."

Sasuke glared at him, "It's not pity. Your reward for beating me."

Still, Naruto resisted.

Sasuke rolled his eyes, grabbed the blonde's wrist and pulled him along behind himself. The Uchiha Main House loomed intimidating against the tree line. The dark, haunted windows had always bothered Naruto, just as the silent roads and buildings that surrounded it had creeped him out the few times he had been to the Uchiha property.

He found himself walking beside Sasuke, the man's warm hand still around his wrist. Naruto bowed his head a little, hiding a small smile. He felt Sasuke's hand loosen and lifted his a little, feeling warm fingers trail over his palm. Fingers intertwined, and for a silent moment, the two were alone and simply two people moving in the darkness, lives connected fully to each other in that single breath.

And then one of them moved away, neither was sure which one it was, but the contact broke, and they approached the gates to the Main House. Naruto watched the thin figure undo the lock on the gate and slip inside, black eyes peered at him through the bars, and for a minute, Naruto had the crazy sense that Sasuke was some wild animal of the night, trapped in a cage, and that his eyes were silently pleading him to let him out. But the moment moved on, and Sasuke was pushing the gate wider, as if an invite.

Naruto slipped inside, keeping his eyes towards the house as Sasuke let the gate fall closed with a loud CLANG. He waited until Sasuke was past him to follow, the fox following the panther into the trap.

* * *

_He had let him go days ago, had silently swore that he wouldn't go chasing after him. But waiting was going to drive him crazy. He was never one to just sit around, but there was nothing for him to do, no missions available that couldn't keep him occupied for more than a few hours._

_He came home the night before his birthday, to the same dark house he always saw. He knew each of the shadows, knew exactly where everything belongs. The shadows and the silence were his family at night. He'd had the vague thought that he'd lose his voice with the dobe gone, and that had made him smirk for a moment._

_He hated conversing with others, and found a lot less pleasure in ticking other people off. Only that stupid blonde…_

_Sasuke made a short sound as he pulled off his shoes. Kami, couldn't he go ten minutes without thinking about him? Was he that imbedded into his brain? Yes, apparently. As he climbed the stairs to the bedroom, he wondered what Naruto was doing at that moment, if he was safe. If he was thinking about him, too._

_Knowing the idiot, he was probably sleeping. Sasuke had the image of Naruto hanging off the side of a bed, drooling. He smiled a little at the thought, and pushed his bedroom door open, pausing to look around the bare room. Naruto always complained about how there was nothing personal about the room. It was a place to sleep, though, nothing more. Why should he fill it with trinkets when there was always the possibility of never coming home from a mission? He sighed and shook his head, reaching up to undo his hitae-ate and placing it on the dresser as he passed, then pulled off his shirt and dropped it on the floor._

_He'd let Naruto stay over, several nights, when he was feeling especially alone and didn't mind the company. It'd been one of those nights that he'd stolen their first…well, second…kiss. He could still remember the startled look, the wide blue eyes and the slightly confused opening of Naruto's mouth. He could remember how he tasted when he'd taken advantage of that open space and kissed him again. And Naruto had responded. It was several long moments before he could pull himself away. Neither of them had said anything, and Sasuke had finally turned away, confused, and let the blonde sleep._

_He didn't let Naruto sleep over after that._

_He sank down on the edge of his bed, chewing on his lip. Part of him didn't want to go to sleep yet, although he had been up for two days. He would never admit it, but he was scared. There were dreams…nightmares…that were so real. He could never remember anything beyond a tall figure with long silver hair and huge wings. And Naruto, Naruto was there, bleeding and crying. And Sasuke was frustrated and would wake up with the need to go find Naruto, to make sure he was okay._

_But he couldn't now. He'd done it before, going to the blonde's apartment, perching on the tree outside and watching over the sleeping form. But there was nothing of him now. What would he do when the dream hit him? When he woke up almost screaming? He buried his face in his hands and sighed. _What's happening to me? It's just a stupid dream. Nothing in it can hurt me or Naruto. It isn't **real**.

_He finished undressing, and slipped between the sheets, resting on his side. His black eyes searched around the dark room, before the rush of painful loneliness rushed through him and he forced his eyes closed and curled in on himself._

Hurry up and come home, dobe. There's so much I have to say. _If only he could understand the weird thoughts that went through his mind enough to know what he wanted to say._

* * *

The house was just as dark, gloomy, and empty as Naruto remembered it. He followed Sasuke through the living room, staying there while the other moved on to the kitchen. As the other vanished through the swinging door, a soft smile drifted over the blonde's lips. It was amazing how easy it was to slip back into old routines.

He sank into the familiar navy blue couch, looking around at the room. _Nothing changed. Same old bastard. Same old house._ He smiled, albeit a little distantly, at the kitchen door, then rose again. There were photos he didn't recognize over the fire place. When he neared, he recognized an image of himself. He didn't know when it had been taken, but it was the two of them, sitting under a tree. Naruto was sleeping, head resting on Sasuke's shoulder. He frowned. He _really_ didn't remember that…

Sasuke wasn't looking at the camera; instead, he was looking down, eyes hidden by his bangs. Maybe he was asleep too. Doubtful, but maybe. He had Naruto's hand in his, fingers laced. What really surprised Naruto, looking at the picture, was how well they fit together. It all looked so…right.

He moved on to the next picture, ignoring the flash of something he didn't recognize in his heart. This image was with Sasuke and a group of people Naruto didn't recognize. His eyes narrowed on the hand resting on Sasuke's right shoulder, and traced the owner of said hand to the person. The man was standing on Sasuke's left, and was slightly taller than the black-haired boy, he had dirty blonde hair and a smirk that seemed to say "I know something you don't know." Naruto didn't like him.

"Dobe?"

Naruto turned away, smiling as his eyes fell on Sasuke's head poking out of the kitchen. Naruto smiled at him, "Food ready?"

Black eyes watched him for a minute. Naruto thought his mask was breaking, for a moment. Maybe Sasuke had found the crack. But then he'd nodded and vanished.

Naruto glared once more at the man in the picture, then followed the man he used to dream about to dinner.

* * *

_No natural creature could move that fast. Before Naruto could blink, the white wings were spread, claws glittering. He didn't see the actual contact, his eyes couldn't follow fast enough. But the next thing he knew, someone was screaming._

_The bird was red, when it landed on its same perch again. RED._

"_KONOHAMARU!"_

_Naruto's eyes widened and he spun. The boy was on his knees, a hand on his shoulder. Blood was gushing from the wound, turning the green grass black. The Lightning Country Lord and Lady were behind him, huddles together, eyes wide and staring at the bird, terrified._

"_Whooo?"_

_The blonde turned on the creature. It stared at him, head tilted._

"_Naruto-san! This is serious!" Sigume's voice reached his ears._

"_Take care of it."_

"_Naruto-san?"_

"_Who's our healer!?"_

"_Move aside." Mizuo stepped forward, short and soft-spoken, dropping down beside Konohamaru, "I'll take care of him."_

**Someone's here.**

(Gee, ya think?) _He felt the fox growl._

**I know this sensation…this scent…**

(There IS no scent.)

**Exactly.**

(Kyu—)

_A soft noise distracted him. It came again, a click, like cogs on a wheel. Again…timed about 5 seconds apart. Naruto frowned and looked back to the bird, blue eyes flashing a bit of red._

"_Whooo?" Click. The head tilted a little, issuing another noise. And again. It sounded so mechanical. Click._

**Get out of here.**

_Click._

_Naruto couldn't move, watching the bird's face slowly turning upside down._

_Click._

**Get out of here, kit.**

"_Naruto-san!" The voice broke through his paralysis._

"_Get him out of here."_

"_Naruto-san?"_

_He stumbled back towards them. "Get them out of here!"_

_Click Click Click._

_Naruto froze and looked at the owl. Its beady black eyes watched him from an unnatural angle._

_He carefully took a step back._

_Click Click Click._

_He froze again._

_Click._

_He turned his head to glare at his team. "Go."_

"_Naru—"_

"_GO! NOW! HURRY!"_

_Click._

"_What's going on?"_

"_I don't know. But you have to hurry." Naruto tried to keep his voice calm, trying to ignore the pulsing warning Kyuubi kept shoving at him._

"_What about you?"_

_Click._

"_I—I'll catch up! GO!"_

_For an instant, there was no reaction. Then there was a harsh sound and soft voices. Naruto could only focus back on the bird._

_Click._

**They're moving away erratically.**

(Scared.)

**Tche. Humans.**

(What's going to happen?) _Click._

**Something bad.**

(…thanks, that's a lot of help.)

_Click Click._

_A cloud blocked out the sun, then slowly slipped away, Naruto watched the shadows reappear. Cliiiiiiiick._

_Well, THAT didn't sound good. The bird's head was almost completely turned upside down. It blinked and flapped it's white wings._

**I know this.**

(How?)

**I don't remember, too long ago.**

(Where?)

**Somewhere...far away…I think…**

_He felt the irony as he asked, _(Who?)

_Click Click Click Click. Snap._

_Snap? Naruto's mind stepped away from the Kyuubi and back to the situation at hand…that damn bird…or what HAD been a bird. The wings were spread wide, body stiff. The eyes had closed and the beak opened. There was a hiss and pale smoke slipped from the birds mouth. Other than that, there was silence._

_Naruto looked confused. Was that it? Some smoke?_

"_Tche." He relaxed and lowered his guard a little._

**KIT!**

_The world exploded in fire._

* * *

They ate dinner in candle light, the only sounds coming from silverware against plates. It all seamed so simple, like nothing had changed between them, like no time had gone by. Naruto tried to relax, after all, this was Sasuke, his old best friend. He looked up and caught ebony eyes, frozen suddenly in the process of raising a fork to his mouth.

They studied each other again. An eternity of silence fell in the house.

"Naruto—"

"Sasuke—"

Sasuke smiled softly. It fit him, and yet looked so wrong. Naruto frowned. Sasuke's smile faltered and he looked away, muttering "Dobe."

"Don't call me that, teme." The automatic response.

That damn smile again.

Naruto wasn't hungry anymore. He set his silverware down slowly, carefully avoiding looking at Sasuke.

"Naruto."

"Yeah?"

Sasuke's voice was soft, "I really am glad you're home."

"Yeah." Then, as an afterthought, "me too."

"You were gone a long time, what…happened?"

"…too much."

"Are you okay?"

Naruto looked, almost shyly at him. Sasuke was playing with his food. Naruto felt his old mask falling into place. "Yeah. It wasn't much. Things don't seem to have changed much here."

Sasuke's fork dropped with a noise that shattered the silence. His shoulders shook slightly, before his head started shaking back and forth. "You're wrong, Naruto. A lot has changed." His voice sounded like it was on the verge of breaking, "I needed you."

"Sasuke…"

"But you weren't here…You. Weren't. Here."

"Sasuke, don't."

Black eyes flashed dangerously, "I needed you. You promised you'd be back."

"I said I'd try. I'm here now." Anger and hurt began to boil in him, spurred on by the ugly look Sasuke was giving him.

"It's not good enough! I NEEDED YOU!"

"Well, I'm sorry, I was busy saving the world." Sarcasm seeped into his voice, "While you were able to come home to a warm bed every night, I spent most of my nights on the run, trying to keep everyone safe." He rose.

"Where are you going?"

"Doesn't matter. I don't want to argue with you."

"Stay."

"No." He moved for the door, "I didn't come here to give you a fucking pity party."

"Naru…" Sasuke's voice was soft again and trailed off before the end of his name. Naruto refused to acknowledge it and pushed open the kitchen door. Firm arms and hands wrapped around his torso. He froze as Sasuke's warm body pressed against him. "Don't go…"

He almost didn't hear the plea, but felt the arms grip him tighter. He thought he heard softly, "not again…" but wasn't sure. If he had heard it, he didn't want to know who the other was thinking of when he murmured that thought; somehow he knew it wasn't himself.

"Let go of me, Sasuke."

"I can't."

He pulled at the arms around him.

"Stay. Please, stay with me. Even if it's just for tonight."

"Who are you?"

Sasuke stiffened, "What?"

"I don't know you. The Sasuke I know isn't like you."

"Naruto…"

"Let me go."

"…no."

Naruto's fingers curled around Sasuke's pale wrists and peeled the other's hands away from him and stepped out of the embrace.

"Naruto!"

"Sorry, but I can't stay in a stranger's house. It would be _rude_."

"STAY, GODDAMN YOU!"

"Good night."

The kitchen door swung closed between them.

Sasuke was frozen, staring at the white door for a long time. An eternity passed before he heard the front door's locks being opened. "No." He murmured, fingers clutching into fists, "You can't. I won't be forgotten and abandoned…"

His body moved with the skill and grace of an ANBU, and Naruto suddenly found the door closed and held in place by a pale hand. Naruto sighed and turned, facing sharp black eyes. "You know, it's all different now. We're not like we were then."

"No. We're not…"

"Let me go find somewhere—" Warm, dry lips covered his own and stopped him from talking. Sasuke's tongue invaded his mouth and sent him reeling into the familiar, well-missed taste of spice that was purely Sasuke. He made a soft noise, succumbing to the wonderful feeling for a moment, before pushing the other off of him.

Sasuke barely moved, simply pulled back and looked at him carefully, calculatingly.

"Stay here…"

"Sasuke…"

"Forget about it all…just…just tonight. And then we'll start over." Sasuke's head dipped to Naruto's shoulder, resting there until Naruto raised his hand to Sasuke's neck. Their eyes met and Naruto nodded silently.

Sasuke's warm fingers intertwined with his slowly, and silently, they moved up the stairs like ghosts, trying to go back to the way things had been, before it had all gone so wrong.

Ch. 3 Fin.

Who's the boy in the photograph with Sasuke? Why is Sasuke so changed? (Damn you, Sasuke-kun for throwing these kinks into the story)

OOOOOOOKAY…so the plan is that there'll be a chapter 3.5 posted on adultfanfiction in the next little while of the smut scene. There'll be an important ending in it, however I think I'll be starting chapter 4 out with the ending of 3.5 so people who don't want to read the smut'll still be able to understand what's going on.

The next actual chapter: The others finally start making appearances (if all goes according to plan)


	4. So Denied, So I Lied

**09/3/12 A/N: **I still can't get over that I pulled this chapter off.

Didn't adjust much, just fixed some grammar and misspelling.

**Original A/N**: Well, happy day! Since now allows mature content again, I present you with more then just a smut insert, but an actual chapter!

This chapter is for S-P/Spirallin, who knows the secrets of the chapter already…I give you…smut!

WARNING: All the entries _not_ in Italics ARE yaoi smut…for those few of you who are really really bothered by it.

**You Can Never Go Home Again  
Chapter Four: So Denied, So I Lied**

The touch in the dark made him shiver, light fingers trailing over his neck. Sasuke didn't bother with the light and Naruto didn't need it; his demon-strengthened eyes easily tracing Sasuke's tall, this frame. They moved together, mouths crushing hard against each other. Naruto felt the door at his back as Sasuke pressed firmly against him.

"Naruto…" Sasuke's voice was scratchy, as if he was a little scared.

"Yeah." Naruto's hands slipped over Sasuke's chest and down his sides to his hips, which seemed to encourage him. Sasuke pushed him harder against the door, tongue swiping at Naruto's bottom lip. Naruto gave him control of a kiss that left them both a little dizzy and gasping for air.

There were soft words Naruto didn't catch, then Sasuke backed off, as far as Naruto's hands let him. "Naruto…"

"Yeah."

"Touch me." It was soft and embarrassing and Naruto felt his pants tighten at the words and blush he could see in the darkness. He kept one hand on Sasuke's hip and lifted the other, touching Sasuke's cheek, then let his fingers slip towards his ear, lifting his thumb to rub it over Sasuke's lower lip. He leaned forward, kissing him lightly, tongue teasing, eliciting a moan from the dark haired boy. He let his fingers trace into the dark hair, taking a grip on it and dragging Sasuke's head back, clamping his mouth on Sasuke's pulse. He felt the other shiver and, encouraged, slipped his other hand from Sasuke's hip down to his ass. Sasuke tensed, but soon moaned softly as Naruto's mouth moved, tongue tracing the contours of his neck.

"Oh God."

He could smell Sasuke's desire and growled, nipping, letting his teeth leave a mark. The hand on Sasuke's ass slid up, never lifting, and found its way underneath. The feel of warm skin drew a purr from him and a soft gasp from the other. Fingers brushed a nipple and the reaction sent a bolt of pleasure to his groin.

"Naruto…" a moan.

"Let's take this off." He was already pulling the shirt up and Sasuke slowly lifted his arms to allow the cloth to be taken away.

That was when the truth hit Naruto. He could smell it, and didn't know why he hadn't noticed before. Sasuke was marked. He stilled for a moment. The scent was old and faded but positively there and he cursed the fox for a moment, wishing he could have just ignored it.

It reminded him.

"Naruto?"

He let his fingers move over pale expanses of skin, finding a nipple and pulling and rubbing at it, distracting the boy against him. He growled again, but Sasuke took it as a passionate noise, rotating his hips against him, grinding him into the door. He shouldn't have been touching him.

But where was the one who'd taken what should have been Naruto's? His fingers dug into Sasuke's hips and held him tight against him, stilling him for a moment as he tried to think.

But there was nothing.

Sasuke was here. He was here. But there was nothing in them. They were just filling space in a long-dead world. Just trying to find something that could calm the pain.

And that was fine. It was what he should have expected. They weren't the same any more. It was just another form of mutilation.

* * *

_They waited for him in silence, huddled in a circle, shaking as they watched Mizuo clean and stitch Konohamaru's wound. It was deep, and even with the temporary stitches and the bit of chakra healing they could spare, it would still be a while before it healed…hopefully enough to be useful._

_Long after the echoes of the explosion, they sat, watching shadows move with the sun, listening for anything. But there was nothing._

"_He must be dead." The Lord spoke in an almost calm voice, "We should move on."_

"_No. We'll wait. Konohamaru needs the rest."_

_There was no protest, only a slight shifting of weight and a small noise from the one in pain._

_The forest itself retained the silence._

* * *

It crossed his mind that he should stop. His tan fingers betrayed him, though. His whole being betrayed. In a swift move, he had the human-shadow against the door in his place. He growled again, though he was sure that was from Kyuubi who was fighting and encouraging his every move.

Foxes remained with a partner for a season , helped protect the mate for a while, then went off until next season, when they found a new mate. Kyuubi tried to rationalize that surely Sasuke was unclaimed now. The scent was old. And yet…he was reluctant.

_Make up your damn mind._ Naruto silently snarled at the beast before pushing the fabric from around Sasuke's waist. Sasuke made a noise of discomfort as the fabric was pulled roughly against his throbbing member.

Naruto silenced the noise with a hiss and pressed a knee between Sasuke's thighs, pushing his hip into Sasuke. He felt Sasuke suck in a breath, felt fingers digging into his arm. He felt the innocence that flowed out of them both, withering and dying as his mouth claimed Sasuke's neck once more, nipping and sucking at his pulse to leave a dark, possessive mark.

Sasuke was exposed, the salty scent flared in his senses and drove him on, as he wrapped his fingers around the hard shaft and pulled gently. Sasuke writhed and gasped and asked for things he really didn't understand. So Naruto gave it to him, tightening his hold while his other hand found Sasuke's ass and pulled him forward, farther onto his knee and away from the door. Sasuke's head fell back with a low noise, exposing pale, vulnerable skin.

The demon flared again. (No. No…go to sleep…_mine_) And he dug his teeth into the pale skin again to prove his point, causing Sasuke to cry out in pain.

The tang of blood hit his tongue as he swiped at the new injury slowly, letting his hand move along Sasuke's cock. Sasuke tensed and relaxed, hips jerking, fingers clawing slightly.

"Nar…" He was silenced by Naruto's mouth.

No words. There were no more words. This wasn't the way they were supposed to be, embracing with their minds in other places. Hollow words would only further taint the darkness. He moved his mouth to Sasuke's ear and heard him moan as he took the lobe between his teeth.

Sounds were primal and soft. Words were sharp and clung to the skin like needles.

They cut through the heart like claws.

* * *

_There was too much noise in the market. It grated on his nerves whenever he was stuck with this patrol route. It drove him up the wall when he was trapped doing it with Neji. And the Hyuuga knew it._

_At least the two of them were being civil that day. He gave himself about another hour until he tore into him. But of course, he'd rip him apart gracefully and **delicately**. He was an Uchiha after all…had to keep up **some** appearances._

_Besides, with Naruto gone, the town was boring as hell. Everyone could benefit from Hyuuga's murder. He smirked to himself at the thought._

"_Something entertaining you?"_

"_Just imagining skinning you alive." His trademark smirk flashed, "And skewering you, maybe freeze some meat and give it to Naruto when he gets back."_

_Neji snorted and looked away, casting a casual glance around. Just because they were having rather unfriendly, polite conversation didn't mean they could slack off. "He'd be truly devastated, when Hinata told him what you've done."_

_Damn that girl._

_Oh well, he could get rid of her too. He frowned. No. That wouldn't work. Naruto may have been stupid, but he'd **know**._

_The Hyuuga and Uchiha clans had always been rivals, the two oldest bloodlines in the village, they had to carry themselves with a bit more pride than others, which meant Sasuke was always vying with Neji, even if he was only a Branch Family. He wondered what the boy would look like hanging from a tree by his hair and smirked again, then caught himself and shook his head._

_Maybe it was a good thing Naruto was gone for now. He feared he was picking up this habit of facial expressions from him._

"_Sasuke-kuuuun!" Sakura's voice trilled through the air and he winced instinctually, before glaring at the Hyuuga who conveniently stepped aside as a thin arm wrapped around his right forearm._

"_Hn."_

"_Good morning, Neji!"_

"_Sakura-san." He acknowledged, but her attention was on Sasuke again._

"_Soooo, Sasuke, tomorrow night, are you excited?"_

"_Do bricks fly?"_

_Sakura was silent for a moment, eyes falling a little._

_Neji smirked and replied, "If they're thrown hard enough."_

_Oh…if only he could wring that pale neck…_

"_Are you coming too, Neji-kun?"_

_Neji shook his head, "I do not attend Uchiha functions."_

Thank god.

"_Oh." Her sunny smile lit her face again, "Well, anyway. Seven o'clock, Sasuke-kun!" She leaned up and snuck in a brief brush of lips against his cheek before he could react, and darted away. Sasuke glared after her and resisted the urge to wipe furiously at the warm spot she'd left behind._

_Beside him, Neji suppressed a knowing grin and continued patrol._

_Sasuke made a sharp noise under his breath and sorely wished, once again, that Naruto was here so he could beat the shit out of him instead._

* * *

Sasuke felt himself being lifted and he automatically dropped his arms around Naruto's neck and wrapped his legs around Naruto's hips, but Naruto didn't keep him against the door, and a part of him wished he had. He closed his eyes, pressing his forehead against Naruto's muscular shoulder. In a few seconds, the mattress pressed against his back, blankets pushed away roughly.

Naruto left the space between his legs for a moment, and Sasuke gave a soft whimper before his pants were removed and he heard them tossed away. Eyes opening slowly, and in the darkness black eyes met blue ones for a moment, before he blushed and looked away. Naruto didn't seem affected by it, and simply regained his place, running warm fingers over Sasuke's skin, pulling another soft noise, which turned louder when Naruto's mouth touched Sasuke's hip, tongue flicking teasingly over the sensitive location.

His fingers threaded into Naruto's hair, and pushed gently, trying to aim the blonde where he wanted him most. He felt Naruto give a dark, rumbling chuckle and didn't have to look to know he was being watched. He felt his face flush again; the intensity of the stare seemed to see through him. He squirmed a little, embarrassment and a bit of humiliation tearing through him as he let out a low noise. But it must have been what Uzumaki was waiting for because Sasuke suddenly lost any chance of coherent thought as the wet warm cavern of Naruto's mouth surrounded him. He tensed, fingers pulling at Naruto's hair as he gasped and his shoulders arched off the bed.

Naruto moved his mouth slowly down the member, eyes peering harsh through the darkness, very pleased at the results his actions were creating. He thrust his tongue along the slit, that seemed to trigger Sasuke's ability to inhale and moan, then had to lock his fingers on Sasuke's hip to keep him from thrusting too hard, too fast, and too deep.

After a moment, he retreated, a line of saliva and precum dripping from his lip to the member. He licked his lips and sat up, knowing that Sasuke would have some kind of lubricant…it kind of stung to have that knowledge. And hurt a bit more when he found an almost empty tube in the bedside stand's top drawer.

Sasuke watched him with heavily-lidded eyes, looking a little lost in himself. Naruto gave in to the urge to lean down and kiss him.

_Forget about it all…just tonight._ That had been Sasuke's words to him. And he had given in so easily.

When he pulled back from the kiss, hanging over him still, and watching him, he saw someone he didn't know reflected in the other's eyes. And for a moment he wasn't in the dark bedroom anymore, for a second he wasn't human anymore. But then he closed his eyes.

Neither could forget. And that made the emptiness in his movements overwhelming.

* * *

_His house was, irritatingly, starting to fill with people already when he got home. For a moment, he couldn't remember why there would possibly so many people standing on the lawn of the, but then he saw the pink-haired ball of energy on the front porch and remembered. Birthday, right. He looked around, silently hoping Naruto would be back. He HAD promised after all._

_But there was no blonde._

"_SASUKEEEEE-KUUUUN!" was his only warning before he found himself stumbling back, his arms filled with Sakura. He frowned and looked down at her as she grinned back at him, "Happy birthday, Sasuke-kun! Come on, the party's ready to start."_

"_There are too many people." She took firm hold of his wrist and began dragging him up the lawn, people calling out well-wishes to him that he promptly greeted with a glare._

"_What are you talking about? Everyone wanted to be here to celebrate."_

"_I'd rather be with Neji." He muttered under his breath._

"_What?"_

"_Nothing."_

_Sakura grinned and pushed open the door to the house. How the hell had she gotten a key, anyway? She pushed him towards the stairs, "Go, go go go. Change into something more suitable. And hurry, everyone wants to see you."_

_Sasuke fought the urge to roll his eyes and climbed the stairs lethargically. He ignored the noise Sakura made behind him and when he reached the upper landing, headed for his bedroom, glaring at the few people who dared to come upstairs, "Party stays downstairs." He growled and they scattered, and he breathed a sigh of relief that at least so far they hadn't invaded his room._

_He slammed the door, smirking to himself and hoping that at least someone downstairs would have heard and been affected in some way. For a moment, he stood in the dim room, eyes on the shades that held out the late afternoon light, before he moved and pulled off the guards on his arms, dropping them to a pile on the ground beside his dresser, then pulling his shirt up over his head, pale skin glittering a little with a light sheen of sweat on the upper part of his chest._

_He paused, arms still in the sleeves of his shirt and looked at the single framed photo in the room. Team 7 when they were younger, he and Naruto looking away from each other, Naruto obviously pouting, Sasuke himself pretending not to give a damn. _Was it easier back then?_ He sighed softly and turned away, tossing the shirt at the wall carelessly and pulled open his closet door. He pulled down a black shirt and a pair of pants, setting them on the bed, then closing the door again._

_He wondered where Naruto was, if he was on his way home. He wondered if maybe Naruto would stop by…if he would even remember that it was his birthday. He found himself staring at that picture again. _When he gets home, I'll ask him for a better one._ He suddenly decided. He wanted an image he could look head-on…that smile that wasn't a mask…_

_He was pulling off his pants when there was a loud noise in the hallway. He cursed and shot a glare at the door, "Stupid people." And silently cursed Sakura for the party once again._

_Acute whispering, and suddenly, as Sasuke was lifting his right leg to pull fresh pants on, had the waistline over his ankle, that his door opened._

_That was the first time he saw Tsugi. That was the first time he felt his entire life shift to a whole new angle since he'd met Naruto._

_It left him shaken. He decided he didn't like the feeling._

* * *

"Enough…do it."

Words, too hard against the softness of the skin. He withdrew his fingers, looking up at Sasuke, before using the rest of the lubricant on himself, then tossed away the empty container. He didn't give a word of warning, wasted no time in pushing deep into Sasuke. The tight warmth made him catch his breath.

Sasuke let out a sharp, high noise, arching up, long, slender fingers digging into his skin. He froze with his back curved off the mattress, gasping. It was the most beautiful vision Naruto had ever seen. He leaned forward, slipping a hand over the small of Sasuke's back, and let his mouth capture a nipple. Sasuke moaned, and shifted, as if trying to fix an uncomfortable position.

Naruto grinned as Sasuke must have pushed his prostate against the intruding member. Sasuke tried to scream, but his breath was too far gone. Naruto liked it that way. Liked how Sasuke's cheeks and skin had more color, especially the places that were red and purple after his lips had been there. He started moving, slow, long thrusts, resisting the primal urge to growl, very satisfied by Sasuke's reaction.

"More…do it, Naruto…"

Naruto's eyes narrowed a little, meeting half-open orbs of darkness. _He's still coherent enough to remember my name…Either I'm wrong or…or…_ He stilled, eyes going wide for a second.

"**Naruto**."

The voice sounded like poison. He shifted, pushing his hands into the mattress, and lifted his hips a bit more, then let himself move faster, his cock throbbing as it disappeared into Sasuke. He moved harder, felt the bed move beneath them. Sasuke's eyes closed and he issued a deep moan, then a sharper cry. Naruto issued a feral grin.

_There._ He slammed into that spot again. Sasuke's hands flew to the mattress beside his head, grabbing at it as he almost screamed.

The beauty. He could see it, could feel it all. Every movement he made, every movement that was a result. Even the way the sheets moved between Sasuke's fingers. Naruto could see it all. He was there. But if he closed his eyes…he was somewhere else.

_This isn't where we were supposed to be._

_I was wrong._

_This is nothing._

_This is everything._

_We aren't supposed to be here._

Because the past cannot die. Because the future is indefinite. Because the future and the past are the same, and we all come back to who we were.

_I can see the things we'll never be._

He pretended, though. Let himself go through the actions, because his body couldn't refuse. He was in love, and that was natural. He was screwing the one he was in love with. Screwing…fucking…

Naruto DID close his eyes, let the illusion stand for a moment, before he opened his eyes, bending over Sasuke farther, and moved even faster. Sasuke's cries were the only thing he heard, because the rest was just darkness, because even his cries sounded pained and lonely.

He murmured, knowing Sasuke would never remember his words, "I love you." Poisoned words. There was no response, as he knew there wouldn't be. Maybe the other heard the words and imagined someone else's lips spilling them.

It was nothing though. Love was an illusion. Endorphins and other chemicals in the blood. In the morning, he wouldn't be in love…that's what he tried to convince himself of, anyway. It doesn't matter what happened that night. _Because we are just forgetting…_

And, a few moments later, he convinced himself it meant nothing when the name Sasuke cried when he came was not his own.

* * *

"_It's been a day…we should move."_

"_But…"_

"_We can't waste anymore time. Naruto-niichan will expect us to be able to finish this without him."_

_Silence for a few moments._

"_Yes."_

* * *

He sat on the edge of the bed, feet cold on the hardwood floor. Behind him, Sasuke was curled in on himself. He could feel his eyes on him.

He felt sick. He wanted to rise and leave. This wasn't how it was supposed to be.

"Naruto…"

He hated Sasuke's voice, in that moment. He leaned forward, wrapping his arms around his stomach. He let the silence stretch.

"Naruto…let me ask you…"

He squeezed his eyes shut, bowing his head. _No questions. It will just further break the rule of forgetting._

He felt the bed shift and Sasuke sat up slowly.

"Did you ever think of me?"

Ch. 4 Fin.

alsjfihgnsff…I never knew it could be so hard to write smut…OMG…*cough*…anywho…

DUN DUN DUUUUUUN


	5. For Love and Sex and Faith and Fear

**9/5/12: **Just adjusted the names of Land of Water/ Kirigakure (minor edit that has always bothered me)

**Original A/N**: You have NO IDEA how thrilled I was with the reviews (even if there weren't quite as many as I was hoping, I mean…in the first hour after it was posted on AFF, there were more than a thousand hits, but only 3 reviews). I'd been talking about it in the sasuxnaru channel on IRC, how I was hoping to get the negative reaction on Sasuke and hoooooooo boy did I get some…made me smile (no, I swear I'm not sadistic)

I broke my own rules for this chapter. The entire thing is the 'flashback' story, except for the final part, instead of switching between the two times, I go between Sasuke and Naruto.

This one's for akuma_river - sorry for making you cry, and sorry for taking like half a year with the bloody chapter. I kinda joined the group of ppl who gave up on Naruto coz of the filler eps and where the manga headed, but I really love this story a bit too much and have been coaxing myself back into the fandom.

Anywho, I really want to thank everyone who's been dropping reviews and even the threatening email or two, and all the people who've faved/watched the fic. I'm sorry for taking so long between chapters and hope this chapter will satisfy you at least a little.

Oh, and yes…I am already expecting my death to be quite profound and violent at the hands of NaruSasuNaru fans…

**You Can Never Go Home Again  
Chapter Five: For Love and Sex and Faith and Fear**

"Did you ever think of me?"

* * *

_It smelled like burning flesh, when the world rushed back to him. Greeted with a pounding head ache and pain lacing over his left side, for a long moment he forgot where he was. But then Kyuubi nudged against the cage inside him and called out to him. _**Kit?**

_He groaned and opened his right eye, the world flashing blurrily, even as he pulled himself to his knees, moaning at the pain. (_What happened? How long was I out? Where's…)_ He froze. Gone. They were all gone. Panic raced through him and shot him to his feet._

**Moved on. I suggest we do the same.**

_For the first time, Naruto took in the damage. The explosion had uprooted trees and shattered the ones closest to him. There were shards sticking out of his skin, his left side. He must have turned in the blast and let part of himself get the head-on attack. (_What the hell happened?), "

**Explosion. The fire was nothing, you'll recover.**

"_Gee, thanks for the concern. Which way did they go and are they okay?"_

**Blood, but nothing deadly. They continued on, I think.**

"_You think?"_

**I was out like you.**

"_You're a piece of work, you know that?"_

_He felt the fox shift and give off emotions of confusion, _**I do not understand.**

"…_never mind." He shifted to move, started to crouch to spring to life, but unleashed a feral cry as pain shot through his leg, and lost his balance, falling to the ground. "OW…what the fuck?"_

**Guess I missed that injury.**_ He felt the fox swish its tails and smirk in humor._

"_Funny, you bastard…real funny."_

**Nothing serious. Hour to heal.**

"_Then get to it. In case you've forgot, I'm a bit busy." He hissed, and instantly felt his body begin healing the sprain. The fox huffed and sent him a mental image of the Kyuubi frying a tiny Naruto._

_Naruto sent a mental image of himself in a fire-fox fur coat._

* * *

_The guy was dirty-blonde, and tall. That was the first thing Sasuke noticed. He had dark green eyes that almost vanished when he grinned, a teasing smile that struck Sasuke as irritatingly similar to Naruto's._

"_This room already taken, then?" The blonde looked around, "No one else here…you waiting for us?"_

_Then Sasuke realized he was almost completely naked, still balanced on one foot, the other one stuck partially into his pants. He growled, and tried to save some dignity, pulling his pants on, before turning back to the blonde. "Get out."_

"_Hey, hey, no need to get snippy, we'll find another room."_

"_No."_

"_Huh?" He blinked and looked a bit oblivious, though his mouth twitched in a slight grin._

"_Get your ass back to the party."_

_The blonde looked a little crest fallen, then looked over his shoulder and came closer to him, like he wanted to keep something between them, "I've been trying to get this chick all night, come on…"_

"_No."_

"_I'll make it worth your while."_

"_Are you trying to bribe me?" Sasuke crossed his arms across his bare chest, trying to keep himself from shoving the other out of his room._

_The man blinked, and looked offended, "Bribe? My dear sir, I do not _bribe_." A grin, "I bargain."_

"…_get out of my room."_

"_Your roo…wait, YOU'RE Uchiha Sasuke?"_

_Sasuke allowed himself to quirk an eyebrow._

"_Ahaha, so you're the elusive birthday boy."_

"_Not that I care much, but, you are…?"_

"_Tsugi. I'm on loan from Kirigakure." He grinned and ducked into a bow, "At your service."_

_Sasuke issued a sigh and looked away for a second, "Well, _Tsugi_, the party stays out of the bedrooms. Take your girl somewhere else."_

"_I WOULD, but…see, she doesn't want to leave. She wants to see YOU, Mr. Popular."_

_Sasuke resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Of _course_ she wanted to see him. They all did. And it wasn't like he was popular by choice! No, if he had his way, he'd be perfectly content to live in a black hole where his only companion was a certain, absent, blue eyed blonde (but only occasionally though…too much Naruto could definitely be a bad thing on Sasuke's sanity and Naruto's physical health). Ooh, he liked that idea…and maybe he could pop out and make occasional appearances for some secret mission._

_Right. And the Yondaime would burst from the ground, hand him a bunch of daisies, and burst into Mary had a Little Lamb._

_He tensed as an arm settled quite comfortably around his bare shoulders and warm breath pushed against his throat. He swallowed, stiffening, hands clenching into fists._

"_Come on…lemme have a room."_

_Sasuke decided two things at that moment. One, he didn't like Tsugi at ALL and therefore added the entire Land of Water to his list of annoying people. And two, he needed to escape and there was only one way to do that._

_He grabbed his shirt from the bed and left the room._

* * *

_They'd made good distance, Naruto was actually a bit proud of his ragtag team. He moved quickly, not quite happy at how easy it was to pick up on Konohamaru's blood-scent. The sun was down and dark, the night's full moon lighting the forest in an eerie cool wash of blue that helped him blend to the scene rather than single him out. At one point, he'd become so drunk off the waves of power the moon was crashing over the forest, he'd had to stop, to remind himself to focus and drag the kitsune back to their task at hand._

_They were huddled close, around a small fire, eyes and ears open. Naruto was a bit disappointed that they didn't notice him, even though he'd made quite a bit of noise (_well it's not like I'm TRYING to be silent, anyway…_). He landed with a loud 'thud', and instantly, Toshio is on his feet, fingers flying into the Horse seal._

"_Yo."_

* * *

_The table that had been taken over for gifts was filled with boxes of all shapes and sized, wrapped in gaudy, bright papers that hurt Sasuke's eyes to look at. Tsugi had finally abandoned him for a gaggle of girls who had taken over the entry hall, and Sasuke thanked whoever was up there that finally took that little piece of mercy on him._

"_Sasuke?"_

_He turned towards the soft voice, somehow a bit surprised to see Sakura standing there. Maybe it was because she hadn't latched on to his arm yet again and wasn't making googly eyes. He nodded his acknowledgement of her, then moved on from the room, going through the kitchen and heading for the back yard._

"_Sasuke, are you alright?"_

"_I didn't want this party."_

_He heard her footsteps pause for a second behind him, then move to catch up, walking beside him as he made his way down into the yard, grass smooth and sticky between bare toes._

"_But it's your birthday. Everyone needs a little party now and then to celebrate."_

"_Maybe I don't want to celebrate it."_

"_But it's the day you were born!" She finally grabbed on to his arm, wrapping her fingers around his elbow, leaning her weight against his side, "It's important. And even if most of these people are just here for the party…there ARE some of us who are actually here to celebrate you."_

_He replied with silence, taking care not to look at her._

"_Is it because Naruto's not here?"_

_He paused for too long before replying simply and bitterly with, "He ruins the party either way."_

"_Sasuke…you know he wanted to be here."_

"_Maybe it's a good thing he's not." He tried to shrug out of her grasp, and failed. The pink-haired girl stepped in front of him, stopping his movements, glaring up at him with calculating eyes. He couldn't take the look, and turned his eyes away._

_In truth…up until she brought it up, he hadn't thought about the blonde since Tsugi had invaded his room. Now he found himself wondering what the other was up to at that moment. Was he okay? Almost home? Surely he must have been on his way back. _It's only a week, what am I freaking myself out over. Sheesh, you'd think I couldn't go on without him.

"_Sasuke?" Her fingers tightened on his arm again, then relaxed once more when he turned back to her, "I'll make them all leave, then."_

_He shook his head, "They're already here. Just get them out by midnight."_

_Sakura's face lit up and she nodded, then walked past him, tugging his arm roughly, making him release a startled noise. "Come on, then, birthday boy! Ino and I made you a cake and you've got presents!"_

_Sasuke rolled his eyes._

_Tsugi grinned at him from the back door._

* * *

"_Naruto!"_

"_Naruto-niichan!"_

_Naruto smiled at them as they abandoned their posts to rush him. He struck a pose, making them all fall back a bit, "You all sound like you were worried! Ha! As if something like an _owl_ could stop the great Uzumaki Naruto!"_

_The boys grinned and looked between each other, rolling their eyes and laughing. Not humor-filled laughter, Naruto took note. Stress. They had been truly worried about him. Not because he was a teammate, but because he was the leader. They trusted him with their life._

_They retreated back to the fire, where the Lord and Lady remained, staring coolly at him. He offered them an over exaggerated bow, then slipped over to sit beside Konohamaru. The ninja cast him a glance and handed him a small bit of his own food rations, which Naruto quickly took and bit into._

"_What happened, niichan?"_

_The others quieted, eyes locking on to him._

_Naruto shrugged, "It was a trap."_

_Sigume snorted, "No kidding." Naruto glared at him, but he ignored it, choosing to lean forward, pulling them all into a counsel. "There's obviously something more going on with this mission than just an escort. What was that owl?" His eyes met Naruto's and held, demanding answers._

_For a moment, he debated against telling them. But rationalized that it might put them in even more danger not knowing. "A bomb."_

_The other boys' eyes widened, but Sigume continued, "Do you have any guess who could have—"_

"_No. There was no one…no scent of anyone either."_

_Sigume crossed his arms over his chest, staring at the fire._

_Naruto turned his eyes to the lord and lady. They seemed to shrink back a bit and he caught them darting looks at each other. He let out a low growl that made them fall together. "You know, don't you?"_

_They shook their heads and the lord grew a bit of a backbone, sitting forward, "Don't accuse us of that, _demon_." Naruto growled again, but the man didn't stand down, "There's obviously someone out for our lives. That _is_ why we hired you all."_

_Naruto tuned him out then, as he carried on, and turned back to the others, "Sigume. We need to come up with a strategy in case the group gets split again. We can't have another incident like this. You were all open to an attack."_

_Konohamaru opened his mouth to protest, but Naruto held his hand up, silencing him._

"_You've done the best you can at the moment, but I could sense you from where we parted. And whoever we're dealing with seems to be a bit more experienced than all of us."_

"_What does Kyuubi think?" Naruto's eyes widened and he turned sharply to Konohamaru._

"_How do you…?"_

"_Kyuubi? The Nine Tails? How would Naruto know what Kyuubi thinks?"_

_Konohamaru looked terrified that he had spilled the beans, and put a hand to his mouth._

"_How do you **know**?" Naruto hissed, eyes sharpening and flashing a bit red._

"_I…the Third…"_

"_He **told** you?!"_

_Konohamaru shook his head quickly, "No! I over…overheard…"_

_Naruto cursed._

_Mizuno rose slowly, looking calmly over all of them, "I think…it's time we had a bit of a talk. This is a bit of a secret that should be told, think you not?"_

_Naruto stared at him for a long moment, as the others stared hard back at him. Finally he sighed, nodding._

This is the part where it all comes apart. _Naruto thought, a pang of sadness shooting through him. _This is where they realize that I…that we are monsters.

* * *

_The room spun a bit and for a moment, he wasn't sure if the room had moved or if he had. The answer was soon apparent, though, when Tsugi came into his line of vision, looking a bit blurry._

"_Oi, Uchiha-chan! You look like you're finally enjoying yourself!" Sasuke couldn't say that the party particularly _sucked_. After all, Sakura had been kind enough to stick close to his side and chase most of the girls off to a distance where he could at least breathe. The pink haired angel had vanished sometime around his third cup of the 'punch'._

_He turned, suddenly losing interest in Tsugi and made his way for the kitchen. More punch. Better be some left. He growled under his breath as he imagined the containers being empty._

"_Whoa, hey, birthday boy, maybe you better lay off?" An arm wrapped around his stomach as he stumbled._

"_Stupid feet." He muttered, stepping over invisible legs he could have sworn were sprawled on the floor ten seconds ago. He tugged the arm holding his stomach away, "'m fine!"_

"_Yeah…don't think so. You can't hold your liquor at all, can you?" Tsugi laughed and Sasuke wanted very badly to hit him. In fact, he got as far as turning and raising his fist, before he remembered that he had been on a quest for more punch. He muttered something even his muddled brain couldn't understand, and tried to stumble away._

"_Wait, wait. You sit here." Firm, warm hands on his shoulders pushed him down onto his couch. Wow, he'd only made it this far? Fuck. "I'll go get you something."_

_Sasuke looked up and it wasn't Tsugi anymore. His eyes widened as blue eyes stared down at him, crinkled slightly in a humored smile. Against the living room's dim light, blonde hair glowed brilliantly. He reached out a hand, eyes wide, and breathed, "Naruto…"_

_A warm callused hand caught his own._

_Sasuke smiled._

* * *

_The fire died down to smolders, leaving them in almost darkness. The others settled, most to get ready for sleep, speaking in low whispers. Naruto had moved from them. After the story, they had gone silent and wary. He moved off to give them space. It was a lot to absorb. To take in that the person you trusted your life in was actually keeper of the great fox demon._

_He didn't blame them at all. No, he had actually expected it. Though he was a bit disappointed that they had learned while they were out on assignment. This might affect everything that occurred in the future. He shifted in his perch, glancing back down at them._

_They'd be out of the forests tomorrow. No more hidden areas; only open lands. Tomorrow, even if they made good time, they'd still find themselves resting in the wide open plains._

_He reached up and gently untied his hitai-ate, sighing as cool air hit his forehead for the first time in ages. Something drifted down with the headband._

"So you don't forget where you belong._"_

_Naruto smiled and picked the object up, lifting it to the moonlight._

"So you don't forget where you will return to._"_

_Green glinted in the moonlight. An echo of a memory crashed into Naruto. He smiled as he twisted the leaf over the moon._

Because there is somewhere for me to go…people who still need me…

_He set the leaf carefully back into the hitai-ate, and folded the headband's blue cloth over it, then slid the whole package into a pocket on his vest. He lay back, letting his eyes wander back to the moon._

"_Happy birthday, Sasuke-teme…"_

Because I belong with you…

* * *

Naruto rose, reaching for his clothing. Sasuke shifted on the bed, but said nothing. He pulled his pants back on, and picked his shirt up gingerly.

The door was cold against his hand, and he didn't look back, simply stared straight out into the dark hallway, "I think the real question is…did _you_ ever think of me?"

Ch. 5 Fin.

I BLAME S-P/SPIRALLIN FOR THIS TAKING SO FREAKING LONG. SHE'S TOTALLY DISTRACTING! I'll start ch. 6 tomorrow…when I've had more than 3 hours of sleep.

Yeah…I'm not too impressed with this chapter, honestly. I think it's coz I'm not reading any really flowingly beautiful work, (like Karin Lowachee, who I was reading when I wrote ch. 4). I really think whoever I'm reading at the time I write affects how the chapter comes out. At the moment I've got Orson Scott Card's Ender's Game, which is NOT an artistically written story, just really really good XD.

Anywho IT'S ALL S-P'S FAULT! :3


	6. Desperate, We Are Young

**9/6/12**: Damn I have/had horrible grammar. Just minor grammar fixes to this one.

**Original A/N:** I'M SO SORRY GUYS. THIS TIHNG HAS BEEN SITTING THERE 95% COMPLETED FOR THE LONGEST TIME…Coz…I didn't want to write the scene with Tsunade and Naruto, lol. It was so fucking hard, to start piecing together that conversation, coz I knew what it'd be about and it was painful for me to even think about. Wow, conversation with Tsunade was harder to write than that smut scene…crazy. (and the one in the next chapter's gonna be even harder to write T_T)

For Hells, my love 3 (And everyone who's been waiting so patiently for this chapter, I SORRY!)

**DISCLAIMER**: I do NOT own Naruto or any characters therein associated with him. All are copyright Kishimoto-sensei. Thank you for your brief attention.

ENJOY!

**You Can Never Go Home Again  
Chapter Six: Desperate, We Are Young**

He spent three hours at the same bath house he'd occupied just hours before. He stood in the spray of the showers, watching warm water slide over his tan skin. Watched his tan skin turn red. It didn't matter anyway.

Everything bleeds red.

When the water turned cold, and people started filing into the room, he figured it must have been morning, and killed the water. Naruto dried himself best he could with one of the bath house's small rectangles they called towels, and pulled on the clothing he'd been wearing the previous day. They smelled like Sand.

They smelled like Sasuke.

He made a note to burn them the first chance he got.

* * *

_Sunlight burst through the tree line, and he heard Konohamaru calling his name, drawing him from the white darkness of sleep. He was still in the tree, feeling a bit dizzy and a bit disoriented. After a moment, stretching, he managed to look down at his team. Konohamaru and Mizuo were up, Mizuo moving around to wake the others, at the same time getting a breakfast prepared._

_Naruto let sighed, glancing around once more, letting Kyuubi's senses stretch out, searching for anything threatening. Once he was satisfied, he let himself drop from the tree landing with the grace of years of practice, on one knee and a hand, and rose, motioning for Konohamaru to come speak with him, aside from the others._

"_You'll stick close to the Lord and Lady today." He held up his hand before Konohamaru could protest, "It's better this way. You can use more chakra on healing. Leave the rest to us." He put a hand on his good shoulder, "Don't go doing anything stupid."_

_Konohamaru nodded, eyes serious, but managed a smile. "Come on, 'nii-chan. Let's have breakfast and get the hell out of here."_

_He watched the other go, then followed, a few footsteps behind._

_Kyuubi shifted uneasily._

* * *

He chose to walk to the Hokage's offices, instead of leaping roof to roof. He'd agreed with his team the previous day that they'd meet at the bridge in front of the building, to organize and be ready to present themselves to the Hokage with honor.

The walk gave him time to think. Let him move on from thoughts of Sasuke, since they only led him in circles, and always to different, more confusing paths. His team had grown, bonded, and for that one year, they had been one being. He wondered when they had gone from a squad, doing a simple escort, to the team taking on an ANBU-level mission.

Tsunade hadn't known. He didn't really blame her.

"Oi." The voice filtered into his thoughts, though he pushed it aside, figuring it to be just another person in the crowd, calling out to someone down the street.

He ducked his head a bit, adjusting his hitai-ate, then dropped his hands into the pockets of his pants.

"Naruto?" Now the voice hit him like a memory from a dream, and he stopped, lifting his eyes from the ground, looking a bit surprised. Standing in front of him, about 10 paces, was Shikamaru. His eyes lit up as he took in the other's form. Practically unchanged, Shikamaru was a bit taller, his hair still up in the ridiculous ponytail, and standing in his normal bored, slouching form.

"Shikamaru!" He felt a piece of him slip back into place, and he launched forward, tackling the other to the ground with a cloud of dirt.

The other released an annoyed noise, but allowed Naruto to cling to him for a few seconds before, "So you're back…We thought…"

Naruto sat up slowly, then climbed off of him, offering him a hand up, "Yeah. We thought we weren't coming back either."

"So what happened?" A different, gruffer voice joined into the conversation, from behind.

Naruto felt a grin slip across his face and he spoke as he turned, "They could smell your bad inu-stench and ran away." Kiba stood with his hands on his hips, and Naruto caught the sly grin that fell into a slightly annoyed frown. Kiba'd grown taller and slimmer, muscles defined along bare arms and under a black netted shirt. There were guards on his knees, scratched from use, and white cloth wrapping around his knuckles and up to his wrists. Dark, tousled hair glittered in the morning light, casting spiky shadows over twinkling eyes.

They stared at each other for a moment, sizing each other up. Then they moved, Naruto simply shifting his weight, as Kiba moved forward, holding out a hand. The blonde reached out to shake it, but Kiba yanked him forward and gave him a giant hug.

A sound much like, "Gack!" escaped Naruto's mouth, before he tried to escape the grip, "Yes," he wheezed, "Good to see you too…"

Kiba laughed and released him, stepping away, "It really is good to know you made it back."

Shikamaru moved to Naruto's side, looking lazily between the two of them, then rolling his eyes and looking away, "You going to Tsunade?"

"Yeah, time for a debriefing."

Shikamaru's eyes turned back to Naruto, heavy-lidded, but Naruto could sense the deep focus. "Is everything okay?"

"Well…the original mission was a success, if that's what you're asking."

"But obviously more went on than just a simple escort."

"Obviously."

Kiba frowned, "You're not going to give anything else to us?"

Naruto shrugged, "Classified until Tsunade-baba says anything. And I really doubt it'll be anything too worrying for Konoha now."

"BY THE BRIGHT SUN THAT SHINES ABOVE US ON THIS BEAUTIFUL DAY…IS THAT NARUTO?" A voice suddenly echoed down the street, startling everyone into silence. As a mass, everyone in the area turned around, and were simultaneously blinded by a tall, lean figure wearing nothing but green and orange, who was striking a pose somewhere between an attempt to be cool and an attempt at surprise.

Naruto quirked an eyebrow, "Lee?"

"NARUTO!" And there was a blur of green and Naruto was again being squished against a firm, strong figure, only this one was actually lifting him off the ground.

"Careful Lee, he's turning blue…" Kiba said through a bout of laughter. Lee set him back on his feet with a blush and a wiggle of his massive eyebrows.

"SORRY!"

Kiba sighed. Shikamaru rubbed the bridge of his nose, "Lee, tone it down, we're right here."

Naruto cracked a smile and shook his head, "Heya, Lee. I see you, at least, haven't changed."

"Hey, I haven't changed!" Kiba protested.

"That's because you'll always be a little kid, trapped in an adult's body."

Kiba snarled at him.

"Look, guys, it's great to see you and everything, but I really DO have a meeting with Tsunade-baba."

"So THAT'S why she looked so irritable." Lee grinned, and struck his trademark pose, thumbs up jammed in Naruto's face, teeth glistening in his smile, "Good luck, fair friend!"

Naruto stared at him for a long moment, speechless. "Um…yeah. Thanks?" He took a step back, and lifted his hand in a wave, "I'll see you guys later, we should have dinner."

"If Hokage-sama's done with you by then."

Naruto flashed a grin that made him look years younger, "She'll be ready to get rid of me before I'm even completely in the room."

"Later, man!"

"Bye, guys." Naruto took a turn into an alleyway, and pulled himself up onto the rooftop of a shop, then took off across the skyline, towards the tower looming in the distance. All signs of happiness that had been on his face just seconds ago were wiped clean and replaced with stony features and cold, hard eyes.

* * *

_The first thing he became aware of was that his pillow was moving in a steady up and down matter. The only thought that crossed his mind was that he must have rolled over in his sleep to cling to Naruto. But something was wrong with that thought, and with the scene. The warm figure beneath his head lacked Naruto's scent, bright and sweet. Instead, the figure smelled like woods, dark and heady. And there was less muscle definition. What the hell was going on?_

_The first thing Sasuke saw when he opened his eyes was a blue tee-shirt, and beyond that, feet stretched out, and just beyond that…the remains of a party. And it all rushed back._

_His birthday party._

_He groaned softly and tried to sit up, putting a hand immediately to his forehead as the warm, sharp pain of his hangover washing over him. When the room stopped spinning enough for him to handle looking around, he discovered that his pillow wasn't the only other person in the room. Bodies were sprawled out all over his living room floor, a sea of trashed humanity._

I'm going to need a lot of coffee…

_And then he tilted his head to his pillow. That bastard from the night before. Tsugi? Yeah, Tsugi. What the hell was he doing, holding him against him? He growled under his breath and shoved the arm slung loosely around his hip off, charging to his feet. Of course, he regretted it immediately, as he swayed, but he wouldn't fall back down again._

_Tsugi made a short noise, grunted, then sat up, blinking blearily._

"_Get out."_

"_Mn, g'mornin to you too, princess."_

"_Shut up and get out. I'm kicking everyone out now." He growled, then attempted to storm passed him and get to his kitchen, hearing aspirin and coffee beckoning to him. He kicked the person sleeping in front of the door, but the figure just grumbled and rolled, so he stepped over them and let the kitchen door swing shut behind him, finding perverse pleasure in the 'thunk' he heard as it smacked the back of the guy's head._

_He heard people moving as he swallowed the aspirin, and then Tsugi was suddenly beside him, leaning against the counter. He glared at him, then turned on his coffee machine. "I thought I told you to get out."_

"_I think you did…" Tsugi shrugged, "But everyone else is still sleeping."_

"_Hn." He glared at him again, and went back out into the living room, and started kicking people awake. He wondered if Sakura was in the mess somewhere. Probably upstairs. He growled rather loudly at that thought, startling awake someone, who woke and sat with a start, then scrambled to their feet and seemed to being searching for someone or something._

_Sasuke stalked up the stairs to the second floor, the hallway was dark and empty, but doors were closed that he tended to leave open. So, he stormed down the hall, throwing each one open with loud bangs, startling people awake, and growled loudly when he got to the end, "Party's long over, go the fuck home."_

_Back down in the kitchen, he found Tsugi drinking _his_ coffee. He glared at him, gnashed his teeth, and poured himself his own mug._

"_Brilliant party."_

_He forced himself to ignore the other._

"_Should do it again some time."_

_Silence._

"_You can't ignore me forever."_

Good thing I've had practice._ He thought smugly, taking a long drink._

"_So what's on today's agenda?"_

_He turned, casting a sharp glare on the dirty-blonde. Tsugi seemed unmoved by the look and simply quirked an eyebrow._

"_Get the hell out of here."_

"_But I rather like it here." He grinned and leaned forward, "I think I rather like you."_

_Sasuke's eyes narrowed, and he turned sharply, retreating once more to the rest of the house, pulling open the front door and shoving a few still-blinking-away-sleep people out._

_He wrinkled his nose as the sunlight streaming through the front door roused his hangover into a new level of irritation. This, of course, meant that things could only get worse._

_Surprisingly, it didn't take Tsugi very long to prove his theory correct._

_The blonde leaned right over and kissed him._

* * *

There were three shadows waiting in the shaded side of the huge building Tsunade called her office, when Naruto approached. As he stepped onto the bridge they moved, and he quickly found himself surrounded by them.

"How is it?" He asked calmly.

"Running smooth."

"It's good to be home." Konohamaru relaxed visibly.

"Don't let your guard down." Sigume shifted his weight, hand hanging in an almost careless gesture, that Naruto knew to be in truth very defensive, a quick movement and his hand could be filled with any of his weapons of choice. Naruto nodded in agreement.

"I have to see Tsunade. She'll need to know."

"Will she do anything?" Mizuo's quiet voice asked a dangerous question.

"Probably not." Naruto crossed his arms and looked at the ground, frowning, "At this point, there's not much she can do. Besides," He looked up at the three of them again, "This is our mission, first and totally. It extended from the original, do we want someone else to come in and finish what we started?"

"NO!" Konohamaru shouted, suddenly looking angry, then shrank back again as he realized how loudly he'd spoken, and tugged at his hitae-ate, which sloped down over his right eye.

"That's what I thought. We all bear too many scars to let this one go. Now," He looked around, eyes casting a casual glance over the city skyline, "while I trust Tsunade and her choice of patrol…I trust you all better."

He started walking towards the entrance.

"Naru-nii." Mizuno called, and he paused, because Mizuno never called out to him for anything, "Remember not to hope for anything."

He nodded and continued.

Hope was something that died out months ago. He barely remembered what that word meant.

The shadow of a giant bird broke through the bright light that divided them. Naruto didn't see it, and the others shot a glance at it, then each other, before dispersing.

* * *

_He felt eyes on them, hundreds, simply watching. They became jumpy, kunai being drawn at even the slightest noise. The Lord and Lady quickly learned to make no sudden movements._

_At midday, they learned the true meaning of humidity, as a hot, wet blanket of air settled over them. They packed away what little they were wearing they could afford to take off, but their heavy clothes that helped hide them weighed them down. They rested in short spurts, when the Lord and Lady demanded it, quiet and heaving for air. Naruto cast short glances around at them all, during these moments, wondering which one would break under the stress first._

_He extended Kyuubi's hearing, listening to movements. But it didn't take Kyuubi's hearing when the sound of fluttering wings reached him. The Lord was on his feet in an instant._

"_Whooo?"_

_The single sound burst everyone into a flurry of movement, weapons of choice drawn, Konohamaru dropped into a protective stance in front of the two non-nin, and Toshio and Sigume behind, in a 3-sided circle of protection. Mizuo had his hands raised, curled into a seal, and they all froze, waiting._

_Naruto had not moved from his seat._

**There.**

_This owl was small. Blending in easily with the branches of a tree about 20 feet up._

"_Who?"_

_It watched him with interest, head tilted. A tan color, this one didn't look anything like the other. It fluffed its wings, looked away from him and preened for a moment, then looked at him again. _

**Alive. This one's alive.**

_Kyuubi rumbled, pleased with itself in him._

**Let's eat it.**

Shut it. Is there anyone else?

**Nothing.**

_Naruto relaxed, and opened his mouth to tell them it wasn't like the last owl they had encountered. But Kyuubi flared suddenly._

_**NOTHING.**_

What?

**There is Nothing…there, above and beyond it. Like before.**

What do we do?

**Move.**

_Naruto rose slowly, looking over at the others, and nodded, "Get your things together. We're going."_

"_But-"_

"_Now." He hissed, pulling his own pack onto his shoulders again, "We have to make good time today."_

_He didn't let them waste any time, helped them get everything together, gave them orders. He put Mizuo with Konohamaru, guarding their charges, he set the others in front, leading. He fell behind._

_And they moved quickly._

_The eyes followed._

_Hundreds._

_The eyes followed._

_And then the weapons._

_Kunai whizzed past Naruto's ear, embedding in the tree just ahead of him. He cursed under his breath, then called an order to keep the others moving._

"_Kage Bunshin no Justu!" And he was suddenly flying with a hundred other Narutos, an intimidation tactic, hoping maybe he could push off the attacker._

_Another kunai._

_He let the others go, slowed to a stop and watched them vanish before turning to face their attackers._

_There were three, all in black and shining, silver material. No hitae-ate. He frowned. Nothing to identify a country. Wonderful._

_And then they were on him, and he didn't have time to think about their nationality anymore._

* * *

Tsunade's office was surprisingly dark, curtains drawn over most of the windows. When he entered, she didn't look surprised to see him.

"Good morning, Tsunade-baba." He offered her a cheerful grin.

She watched that face he used as a mask for a moment, before nodding and rising to greet him. Instead of a warm handshake or hug, he gave her a hard salute, then waited for her to take her seat again, before he would relax even the slightest bit.

"I'm glad to see you survived the night."

Naruto shrugged and slipped into one of the uncomfortable chairs, "I've seen worse."

Tsunade watched him, quiet, but he gave her nothing else. She drew out a file, opening it slowly, "The others have turned in written accounts, but there seems to be large gaps."

"A lot happens in a year."

She folded her hands and leaned forward, "Maybe you should tell me about it."

"I've written a report."

"Indulge me."

He suddenly looked uncomfortable again, shifting and looking around.

"What happened, Naruto? What's made you so jumpy? It's all over, isn't it?"

The last question made him freeze, then ask carefully, "Who said it was over?"

There was a soft knock at the door, then a familiar face appeared, "Hokage-sama?"

Naruto was on his feet, breath caught in his throat, "I-Iruka-sensei."

Iruka's face broke into a smile and in an instant; the two were meeting in the middle of the room to share a warm embrace. For a moment, Naruto let himself feel like his old self, seeking comfort in the familiar arms. And then they were stepping away, and Iruka was going to ask questions. Questions Naruto wasn't ready to answer.

"Can I help you, Iruka?" Tsunade broke the reunion, "We were just beginning a debriefing."

"Ah, sorry." Iruka scratched the back of his head, "I just wanted to see if you still had time later for that meeting we had talked about?"

Tsunade nodded, "Bring everyone in two hours." She glanced at Naruto, "If we're not done, then we'll take a break and indulge you."

"They'll be happy to see you, Naruto."

Naruto looked confused, "Who?"

"Your friends."

_Friends._

The word was bitter in his mind, like an old fruit he'd forgotten to dispose of. He'd forgotten the meaning of the word, and it all came rushing back in a sudden wave of mental anguish.

"Oh. Yeah." Was the only lame reply he could come up with.

Iruka smiled anyway, issuing a short bow, then vanished out the door.

Tsunade turned her golden-brown eyes on Naruto again as the door clicked shut. Naruto ignored her for a moment, then sighed and faced her again.

"Start."

"From where?"

"The best place. The beginning."

"Well…I suppose, the best place to really begin…is the moment we realized we were lost."

* * *

_He couldn't get his bearings, they moved too fast, kept him spinning and retreating, looking for an opening and finding nothing. Around him, his team fought to keep their charges protected._

_The clash of metal on metal, as two kunai connected. Grunts. Scents._

_Kyuubi continued to get nothing, and was useless to Naruto._

_And then they fell back, vanishing into the shadows._

"_Naru—"_

"_Shut up."_

_Silence, everyone froze. Naruto sorted through the sound of everyone's heavy breathing, but found none that didn't belong in the group._

"_Hurry up."_

"_Slow down."_

"_All the time in the world…"_

"_And no where to run."_

"_What now, little fox?"_

"_What now?"_

_Three voices. One right after the other, changing location each time. Naruto spun. His team watched him for a signal or guidance of what to do next._

Think, Naruto. **Think**.

"_The games begin, little ones."_

"_Don't blink."_

"_Or you're dead."_

"_Don't sleep."_

"_The nightmare becomes you."_

"_Don't breathe."_

"_Or Mercy shall not fail to find you."_

**Riddles.**_ Kyuubi growled, _**I hate riddles…let me eat them.**

_As tempting as that sounded, Naruto forced himself to ignore the comment and not reply._

_A flash of light to his left and he was spinning, Kunai whistling through the air. He almost missed the figure dropping to the ground, fingers splayed. The ground rippled._

**Strong. Sweet.**

Dangerous.

_It was female, wrapped in tight coils of black, ankle to wrist, with silver guards on her forearms and shins. Brown cloth covered her hands and mouth. The piece around her chin wrapped back over long brown hair, sealing a ponytail to the back of her neck. Dark eyes glittered._

"_Hello, boys."_

* * *

Uchiha Manor was quiet, the soft sound of bare feet echoing coldly across hard wood floors. He moved from room to room, breathing in cold air and dead spirits, exhaling them in small puffs of frosted breath.

Disconnected from himself, Sasuke questioned what had happened.

_Alone. Left you alone again._

And he deserved it. He deserved the sound of doors closing. He deserved the sharp pang of waiting for someone to return to him. He had well earned waking in a cold, empty bed.

_He knew. Somehow. He knew. He knows._

Someone was knocking at the front door. Sasuke changed his path, moved a little faster.

_Naruto knows. He'll never understand._

He pulled open the door. A messenger held out a scroll, and remained silent, looking bored. He took it, nodding to the boy, then turned away. He broke the plain green seal as the boy vanished.

**Hey there, hot stuff!**

Sasuke almost dropped the scroll.

_That handwriting._ He stumbled back, and stared at the single line. Fingers shook as he unrolled the parchment and more words spilled out.

He knew that handwriting. The slow curve of hiragana, sloppily flowing together.

At the end, he found a signature he'd recognize anywhere. Kanji that formed a name he never thought he'd see again.

**Tsugi.**

Ch. 6 Fin.


	7. Hold Your Head High, Heavy Heart

**9/6/12: **Nothing much changed here. Rereading it boggled my mind. Hopefully my return to writing this will keep up the epicness.

**Original A/N:** …I suck at fight scenes, so…uh…blame that for why this took so long…coz I wanted to perfect them…and thank _Bleach_ for the good parts…

Thank you all so much for all the reviews! It was so awesome to know people are still willing to pick up this story!

_Terra Minuit_ – I really got myself confused on the whole water/wave country thing. It is actually, Kirigakure, the Hidden Village of Mist that Tsugi's from, which is 'Water Country' that the dub turned into 'Wave Country'. This is what I get for actually bothering to watch any part of the dub.

_Nates _– You…are incredibly observant…and I'm not going to say anything more or I'm going to give things away. XD

**DISCLAIMER**: I do NOT own Naruto or any characters therein associated with him. All are copyright Kishimoto-sensei. Thank you for your brief attention.

ENJOY!

**You Can Never Go Home Again  
Chapter Seven: Hold Your Head High, Heavy Heart (And Save your Strength for the Morning After)**

"People meet and people separate.

They have a past, a present, and a future.

The brief moment when they shined even more brightly than the stars, was when they lived earnestly."

-_Glass No Kantai ep. 5_

* * *

_Her laughter made him think of a house of mirrors, made him confused and scared as he thought of a thousand versions of himself and his team. Her laughter made him think of the sting of silver, the sweet noise that could follow any of her movements, if she dared to draw her short sword._

**She won't get far if she does.**

_She made Kyuubi think of things beyond the cage, of dark corners and moving shadows far worse than anything these human children had ever seen._

"_Who are you?!" Konohamaru. He cursed the kid under his breath._

_The woman grinned, a set of pearly whites glittering in the backdrop of her darkness, "I am the third and first, the outer edge of the shadows. I am the beginning of the blur. Soon, you will be trapped inside." Her fingers drew slim kunai, in a motion faster than Naruto's eye could follow. But she didn't move._

_And that was Naruto's first mistake._

_They weren't fast enough, he knew. But he didn't try to retreat. He should have. He should have had them take the Lightning family and **run**. Instead, he dropped his center of balance lower, drew his hands in front of him and let his chakra begin to pulse, blue and brilliant, around him._

_Her grin grew wider._

_That was his second mistake._

_And then they were moving, the two of them, a blur of hands and arms and legs and steel, a dance that kept Naruto's mind blank. If he missed his steps, they were dead. If his charges dropped their guards, they were dead. If any of the other nin that had been following appeared…they were beyond dead._

Dead. Dead. Dead.

_And then her kunai vanished. All he saw were those white teeth, glittering, and then he was falling. Falling. Falling._

_His eyes met brilliant blue skies, and the edge of the forest, the edge of a cliff…and his teammates were falling after him._

_And they fell like rain against the cloudless blue sky. Then heaven must have risen to meet them, as he was surrounded by brilliant gold._

_And then he knew only dark._

* * *

Tsunade's eyes could break his shell. She could read how the story was affecting him. There were words between the lines, but she didn't push him and didn't interrupt.

"We were in a field. I don't know how the rest survived the fall." _Kyuubi saved me, the others, Fate had plans for._ "When I opened my eyes, I was disoriented, and I couldn't hear the others." _Terror. The thought of being alone._ "And then I heard that laughter."

There was a knock on the heavy door, startling both of them.

"Enter."

"Tsunade-sa…ma…" a feminine voice.

Naruto was on his feet in an instant, blue eyes wide. Familiar pink hair, bright green eyes, slender frame…

"Naruto!"

"Sakura!"

The two stared at each other, looking across time. She'd matured beautifully, just as he knew she would, tall and slim, her pink hair long and cascading down her back. Her figure was well toned, but hidden under barely tanned smooth curves.

The moment was tilted when Sakura stumbled into the room and broke her gaze to glare at the doorway.

Neji Hyuuga had always been an intimidating force to be reckoned with. As he grew into maturity, this factor had only developed. It'd only been a year, but Naruto barely saw any signs of the friend he'd left behind, as he met the cool eyes of the shadow in the doorway.

He'd cut his hair short, leaving two lengths extending to his clavicle, framing his face, and had his hitai-ate dropped almost casually around his neck.

Tsunade frowned at the two, "I said two hours."

Sakura spared her a glance of almost apology, before she squeaked and launched herself at Naruto.

If it hadn't been for years of refined training, Naruto would have found himself on the floor. Instead, he was caught in an awkward hug, her arms tight around his neck, his loose against her hips.

"You're BACK!" She pulled back, hands flying to his cheeks, turning his head left and right, "You're not injured or anything?"

He couldn't help laughing softly and shook his head, "I'm alright. I'm home."

She smiled at him and for a moment he was distracted by how nice maturity had been to her.

"If he was injured, I'd have killed him."

Sakura glared at Neji over her shoulder.

Neji ignored her and politely shoved her aside, stopping close in front of him.

Naruto met his eyes, quiet, and then extended his hand.

Neji's hand was warm and rough, a firm grip to match his firm eyes. Naruto felt a genuine smile tweak at his lip.

"Come find me later." Neji's voice was deeper, water over rocks. Naruto read his eyes, an invitation to spar. A challenge to test his strength. Naruto nodded, but Neji was already turning away.

He suddenly got the feeling of being an outcast in a pack of animals. And actually, now that the idea came to him, that's what ninja were. More than human, less trust or emotional attachment. They were feeling him out, wondering if he would challenge their strength, if he would take over as Alpha Male.

Somehow, he had a feeling they'd blindly follow him if he did. After he proved himself.

Neji spoke softly with Tsunade and Sakura stood close to his side, arms tucked behind her back. Naruto raised an eyebrow when he noted this, then it dropped and his eyes narrowed as a scent reached his nose. He smirked.

Sakura must have felt his eyes because she glanced at him and froze. His smirk grew and his gaze flickered to Neji, then back to her. She blushed and quickly looked away.

_So…_

"...nd since Naruto's here, maybe he can assist-"

"Don't get trigger happy, Naruto just got back, give him a few days to relax."

"It's fine, Tsunade-baba…" Naruto broke in, "Sitting around doing nothing makes me nervous. I'd be glad to help."

"See? Same old Naruto!" Sakura quipped in.

No one noticed the look the blond shot at her, or how quickly he captured his falling mask and put it back in place.

* * *

"_Good MORNING, Sunshine!"_

_Sasuke groaned and tried to pull his comforter over his head. The sun was shining in through the window, meaning it was way too early still. Uchiha's don't do early mornings if they don't have to._

_Or at least this one didn't._

_There was silence in the room._

_Wait Hadn't someone…said…somethi-_

_His eyes flew open._

"_Ah, finally…" Someone was grinning at him, someone with blonde hair…_

_He sat up, scowl on his lips, fully ready to tear Naruto a new asshole…and froze._

_Tsugi quirked an eyebrow at him._

_Fuck._

"_How do you keep getting IN here?"_

_Tsugi grinned and rose, "No questions, get on up, let's have some fun."_

"_Not with you, thanks." Uchiha's don't do fun either._

"_No need to be a spoil sport. UP!" His blankets vanished, and flew across the room. He watched with dismay as they landed on his nice clean floor with a soft noise. His eyes moved from the pile of soft warmth to the man standing beside his bed, "The day is young and so are you!"_

"_Get the hell out of my house."_

"_Make me." Tsugi shot him a cocky grin and headed for his closet, "Let's see…hm…mm-hm…" Clothes flew across the floor._

_Sasuke's scowl grew as he stood, rubbing sleep from an eye, and looked around for a kunai or shuriken._

"_Here! Wear this!" Clothing hit his face. Damn it, he hated mornings._

"_Go to hell."_

"_Put it on and I'll take you to heaven, baby."_

_Cocky bastard._

"_I'll bring coffee."_

…_damn it._

"_I'll make coffee right now if you get dreeeessed."_

_Sasuke grunted._

_Tsugi grinned and bounded out of the room._

_A bird chirped outside his open window._

_He really, _really_ wished he knew where the kunai he kept next to his bed went._

* * *

The two ninja bowed to the Hokage, and backed away for the door, Sakura stopping close to Naruto, fine fingers reaching out to touch his shoulder.

"I'll wait for you to finish."

"It could be a while."

She smiled at him, "I don't mind waiting. Today's a good day for a chat." Then flicked her wrist in a wave and followed the other nin out of the room.

Tsunade watched them leave with a half smile that dropped as soon as the door closed.

"I still don't understand why this mission couldn't have been wrapped up in a much shorter time."

"Because things became complicated. These people weren't normal humans. Weren't normal ninja."

"What were they, then?"

"Rogue like we've never experienced. Not like the Akatsuki. They're like a complicated web, with one person at the center, controlling it all."

"Who was it?"

"Not was…_is_. He's still out there, waiting."

"For?"

"Me. You. Konoha. And everything else."

"So we're dealing with a mad man, then."

Naruto shook his head, and couldn't help pacing across the floor, "No. If anything, if you ever hear him speak, he has more sense than any of us combined. He holds himself in such control. He knows what he's doing and where he's going to take this all."

"So you've met him."

"Several times."

"Does he have a name?"

Naruto looked up at her, "It's in the report."

"All the report mentioned was a quick sentence about 'Mercy'."

Naruto nodded, and glanced towards the window, "And if you're lucky, no one in this village will ever have to know why."

* * *

"_Sea of gold…sea of red…it'll all be pretty in the end."_

_Laughter._

_God, he was starting to hate that noise._

"_Everyone alright?" he heard called from his left, then shifting and Konohamaru appeared beyond the half veil of gold. His eyes focused, finally having a point of reference, and realized they were in a field. Others rose out of the blur around him, so he moved to follow suit._

"_Climb on up, little fox. Time to see the road to the end."_

_She was perched on a rock, in a crouch, obviously grinning underneath her mask. He wondered why she didn't attack while they were so disoriented. Her laughter strung over him as he climbed to his feet, swaying a little. He shook his head, then looked up at her, then around at his team. They looked worse for wear, Mizuo with a gash in the center of his lower lip, a nice bruise forming on his chin. The others looked little better, and all moved to keep themselves between the woman and the Lord and Lady._

Focus.

_She tilted her head._

FOCUS. This is still the first part of the battle…be weary…know that she doesn't have her guard down, despite appearances…

_Her fingers tightened just the slightest._

This is still where she's measuring us out…

_Her eyes flickered to the right._

Where she doesn't know our strengths…

_She flew left suddenly, startling everyone. The movement was a blur, a quick drop of the legs, and she landed on the ground in front of Konohamaru. Naruto saw the way Konohamaru froze up, caught off guard._

_There was a clash of metal against metal. Naruto's body instantly reacted and he squeezed his eyes shut._

"_Come now." Naruto opened his eyes again, "The road is long, but all too short for each of us. Play a little wilder now." Konohamaru was still frozen, eyes wide. His body shook ever so slightly. A kunai pressed against the center of his hitai-ate. She grinned wildly._

_The blade slipped down, scratching a crooked line down the metal plate. Her grin grew, as it made a clipped sound as it slid off the plate and past the cloth to reach skin. A red line streaked down the middle of his forehead, slowly, slowly drawing down too close to the eye…_

_She drew back, "Hurry and draw your weapon of choice, boy-o. Time waits for no one, especially the blood-stained."_

_Konohamaru's eyes sought out Naruto, then over the other members of the team. Naruto felt Kyuubi issue a low growl, which made its way out of his throat. Konohamaru gulped, and drew a set of kunai._

_Her teeth flashed, "That-a boy."_

_She moved too quickly for Naruto's eyes to see, but somehow, Konohamaru got his hands up in time to block her from crashing into him, though he stumbled back, and lost his footing in the soft dirt._

_Naruto heard someone draw a weapon in the team. He glanced away._

_One look was all it took. All it ever takes._

_Konohamaru screamed._

_The woman's kunai was glistening red. Konohamaru had dropped his weapons, had fallen to his knees, and was clutching his eye._

"_Gods of humans gave eyes to see the beauty and the pain in this world. Gods of Gods take that sight away. Mercy welcomes those blinded from the terrors of the world." Her voice was like the cold, bloodied steel in her hand, dripping, pooling on the ground and somehow, tainting it._

_Konohamaru let out a quiet sob._

"_Is this the best Fire Nation offers? This weakness? This pitiful, crying beast?"_

_Still, Naruto didn't draw his weapons._

"_Perhaps I shall put you out of your misery, boy-o."_

Wait. Just wait. This is the transition, the second part of the dance. He'll decide. He'll make his move or fall…

"_This isn't our battle anymore…" He whispered softly._

Get up, Konohamaru…

Get up.

* * *

Sakura was waiting faithfully, leaning on the railing of the bridge, watching the water. He strolled up casually, slipping into a softer roll, pushing his hands into his pockets, "So you really did stay."

"Of course." She smiled at him, "Come on, walk with me." She looped her arm through his, and took the lead, "The village has changed a lot since you left."

"That's what happens when life gets in the way."

She laughed softly, "I suppose."

He cast a sideways glance at her, "So…you and Neji seem close." She stiffened, but kept walking. He couldn't help grinning, "I saw those dirty looks you were shooting each other."

"Naruto!"

He laughed.

She smacked his arm, but settled comfortably against him again, and sighed, "Are we that obvious?"

"Of course not. I just happen to be good at picking up on these things."

"Oh yes, because you've had so many many women falling all over you."

Ouch.

Sakura gasped, and covered her mouth, "Oh. Oh, Naruto, I'm sorry, that was bad."

He shrugged and smiled, keeping a firm grip on his mask, "For what? It's true."

She let him take the lead, probably as an apology, but he didn't care. He directed them towards his old neighborhood.

"This area's fallen apart, I see."

Sakura nodded, gripping his arm tighter, "It's not safe to walk around alone here."

"Good thing neither of us are alone." He said softly.

She looked up at him, green eyes sparkling in the beginnings of the sunset, and smiled, "No. We're not."

The first _Hanamachi_ met them a block from his old apartment.

"It's become a red-light district?" He asked, curious as women in fine Kimonos passed, looking at the two curiously, then looking away.

Sakura wrinkled her nose, "Sadly. They pretend to be geisha…and put a dirty spot in our city."

"If they're a dirty spot…" Naruto said, watching three painted women cross the path ahead of them, watching the two nin as they glided gracefully across the dirt, then speaking to each other quickly behind their fans, "Then we ninja are the blood stain."

"What?"

He couldn't look at her, "We're no different from them."

"That's not true!"

"We both wear masks, both work for a greater good."

"They sell their bodies!" She pulled away, looking up at him angrily.

"So do we, Sakura. They become sheaths. We become weapons."

* * *

"_Konohamaru..."_

_Movement. Subtle. The gold waves swirled._

"_Get up, boy-o."_

_Naruto felt a sudden pull, eyes widening, as he realized what Konohamaru was doing. She realized it in the same second. The boy was making the dive, gathering his chakra into a wall. Quickly._

_Too quickly._

_Naruto barely had time to dive for the Lord and Lady, before the initial pull drew the long stalks of hay towards Konohamaru, and then the sudden rush of power, too much for someone with Konohamaru's limited training._

**Kit!**

_Naruto felt Kyuubi's chakra pour through him, felt the warm energy wrap around him and his team. _Save Konohamaru…_ he thought, before he watched the hay fall flat against the ground and felt the sudden sting of power._

_He blacked out for a long moment, when he came to, the energy had subsided, and he managed to drop the burning red shields from around him and his team._

_He struggled to sit up, to look at his team._

Konohamaru…

_There was cursing, and labored breathing. He found Konohamaru struggling to his feet, one hand still over his eye, the other wiping blood from his mouth. He sought out the others, felt their chakra still pulsing, but dim, knocked unconscious. Konohamaru made a choked noise._

_The girl was pulling herself to her feet, looking stunned. Her long hair had come lose, and now flew about wildly for a moment, before settling against her shoulders. Her eyes narrowed, as she wiped a spot of dirt from her cheek._

"_Bad move, boy-o."_

_Konohamaru coughed, "Then come learn what the Fire Nation is really about."_

Somehow…somehow, we've moved from the second stage to the final stage of battle…_ Naruto thought. _Too fast. He's not ready. Especially after that unfocused release…

_Konohamaru laughed softly, and his hand went from his eye to his hitai-ate and tugged it down to an angle, covering his injury._

"_I'll even finish you with one eye."_

_Konohamaru's kunai drew from the ground, along with two more from his holder. The four connected at the handles and began to glow, rising in front of him, and started spinning, slowly, at first, then faster as his eyes narrowed on his opponent. When they were the illusion of a soft blue disk, he lifted his blood-stained hands, using one to brace the other just behind the spinning blades, and set his feet into the dirt._

"_KAZE NO SHI TSUNO SEISHIN!" (1)_

_The blue light exploded, and blinded them, Naruto shielding his eyes._

_The woman screamed, an enraged noise. There was the sickening sound of slicing skin._

_Blue streaked across Naruto's vision, and suddenly, Konohamaru held all four kunai again._

_Where the HELL had he learned something like THAT?!_

_Konohamaru was slouching a little, breath heavy, visible eye burning with anger. Naruto followed the gaze._

_The girl still stood, an arm wrapped around a nasty slice in her chest._

"_Mercy grants life to those who believe in Him. His is eternal life. His is eternal glory." She attacked, single-handedly. The clash and clang echoed across the field, as the fight grew weaker and weaker._

This is the end.

"_Your misguided faith shall be rewarded in DEATH!" She screamed the final word, and threw herself at him._

_As he heard the kunai sinking into her chest one more time, Naruto wondered if she was speaking to herself or to them._

Ch. 7 Fin.

1. Kaze no tsuno seishin = Four Souls of the Wind

**Blink**. Omfg, I finished it. I actually finished it. Okay, just going to post this up and go to bed. Because it's late. Damn fight scene.

Next Chapter: The letter. The enemy. Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke in a painful reunion.


	8. It's Just A Dream You Dreamt You Had

**9/9/12: **Don't think I changed a thing.

**Original A/N:** I think quite a lot of people were confused by Konohamaru in the last chapter. Honestly, I was too, I hadn't had his outburst planned when I set out to write the chapter. Originally, it was going to be a fight 3 to 1, but something just made me turn it into a duel between the two. Maybe it was just a chance to let Konohamaru grow a little. As such…apparently I'll be making slight adjustments to my original plans for this chapter.

**DISCLAIMER**: I do NOT own Naruto or any characters therein associated with him. All are copyright Kishimoto-sensei. Thank you for your brief attention.

ENJOY!

**You Can Never Go Home Again  
Chapter Eight: It's Just A Dream You Dreamt You Had**

_This is not a love song. This is not a sweetened version of the truth. This is a life song. With black and white, and more gray than we can handle. So toss out your dreamy visions, your grasp on hopes and lies. This is how it really is. With all the pains of life._

* * *

**Hey there, hot stuff!**

**It's been a while, hasn't it? I'm missing the sunny weather of Konoha. It's only sunny here in between the storms. I'm wanting a nice long shower and some of your sweet skin.**

Sasuke held the letter at arms length, not sure if he really wanted to touch the parchment.

**I'm sorry we parted the way we did, I'm sure we both said things we didn't mean.**

**In apology, I'm sending you a gift, but it won't be there for a while. The person I'm sending it with has a few other errands on His list.**

He stiffened. Tsugi wasn't one to apologize. Unless he was up to something. And he certainly wasn't one for presents. It had to be a trick, or a catch of some kind. Or maybe Tsugi knew a tease like this would bother him.

**I don't think I'll be on this mission much longer. When it's over, though, I'll return to see you. And we'll settle everything. You'll see our mistakes like I see them.**

**See you on the other side.**

**Tsugi.**

* * *

_Her eyes were glassy, her last expression pleased, as a hand gripped Konohamaru's shoulder. The boys eyes were wide and his skin pale as she slid down his frame into a pile on the ground._

"_Kono—" Naruto stopped Mizuo._

_Konohamaru started shaking. Time stopped, he stared at the crumpled form._

"_We can't just stand here…"_

"_Shut up, Sigume, this is the first time he's—"_

_Konohamaru's kunai hit the ground with a hollow 'thunk' effectively silencing them. Tremors became visible as Konohamaru turned, eyes lifting, "Naru—" he stopped short, and Naruto thought, for a terrifying moment, that her final attack had connected and he was looking at a dead man. But Konohamaru moved, a hand lifting to the blood escaping from under his hitae-ate._

"_Come away, Konohamaru. Let's patch you up as best we can."_

"_The body."_

"_The others will deal with it." Naruto gestured again, "Mizuo."_

"_Yes. Konohamaru, we have to see if we can save your eye."_

_The young man looked between each of them, and then promptly passed out. Naruto moved, an instant reaction, catching him before he could hit the ground._

_He glanced at the Lord and Lady, then hauled Konohamaru into his arms and walked away from the pool of gold and red, hating the sound his footsteps made in the blood-soaked soil._

* * *

"I don't think this is a good idea."

"Why not? It won't hurt anything. We'll only stay for a moment." Sakura dodged a branch and looked at Naruto, trailing behind. She paused, putting a hand on her hip, "Uzumaki Naruto, this is something you know you need. Just for a moment."

"Why? A reminder? 'Don't get too cocky, your name'll be there one day.'? Thanks, but I can remember that just fine on my own."

"Naruto."

He crossed his arms.

"Don't be like this." She came back to him, touching his arm, "Please, trust me."

_Trust._ The word was like a cool breeze, the way it came off her lips, and for a moment, he just stared at her.

She must have taken his silence as permission, because she extracted one of his hands and pulled him forward.

The rock seemed smaller than he remembered; the list longer. The half-staffed flag whipped out lazily in the evening breeze. Naruto felt his heart die in his throat. Sakura's footsteps slowed, as she pulled him to the monument.

"I suppose…" Sakura began, then fell silent. Naruto let her words die on the breeze, but she resurrected them too quickly, "I suppose I want this to be a reminder for you…"

He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye.

"A reminder that…we're only human. Even you." She turned to look at him, "One day, one of us might not come back."

Naruto's eyes flashed for a moment.

"But you're special, Naruto." She turned her back to him again, "You're made of different things than the rest of us."

"Sakura…" Did she know? Did she know about Kyuubi?

"You've shown us what it means to keep on going, what it means to live life like each day could be our last. That a smile can make anyone feel better. That a joke, no matter how lame, will lighten the worst fear. It's okay to reach out, and to take, as long as you give in the end…Maybe, one day, you won't return. Maybe your face will never be carved in the Cliffside."

She looked over her shoulder at him.

"But your name is already immortal."

She smiled softly at him.

And he felt a little more human.

* * *

_It seemed appropriate to him that when they made it to the border, the clouds swept in and they were greeted with the roll of thunder and flashes of lightning. He didn't let them stop when the rain began. For a while, he enjoyed the chill against his skin, and was able to block out the sound of complaints from their charges._

_Like this, listening to the noise of the light storm, he could think of nothing and everything. The sound of the rain made him think of Sasuke, fingers rolling across the kitchen table, an annoyed tic. The thunder made him think of those same fingers in his hair, the lean body pressing him into the wall. A mouth on his. The lightning wiped those thoughts clean, only to die and let them rise again._

_Nothing in this life is forever. We are only here, only now. But we rise, like the tides, as many times as we can. Until we are burned to nothing._

_Naruto pushed them hard, even though he could hear them gasping for breath, and even though the rain was beginning to pound down like needles. Something was pushing him, telling them they had to move. They had to get these two home. This journey had already been too long, Sasuke would be furious at him as it was. The longer this took, the more possibility that the Ice Prince would shove a few kunai-shaped ice sickles down his throat._

_Something in the back of his mind, though, nagged at him. That nin that had attacked them. There had been more, he'd known it. But…when the first had fallen, there had been no more. If anyone of those nin were in their right mind, they would have attacked, especially when they were wrapping Konohamaru's eye. Or maybe that was just Naruto's way of thinking._

_He heard a sudden pause in footsteps behind him, and slid to a stop on the muddy ground._

"_We are almost there." The woman murmured._

"_So why are we stopping? It's too dangerous." Sigume shifted, feeling jumpy._

"_ANBU from the village will meet us." She bowed over hands clasped at her chest. Pale, red chakra blossomed to life as she pulled her hands away from her body, creating a red orb against her palms. She straightened, and murmured something Naruto didn't quite catch, then watched the red orb float into the air._

_Signaling beacon._

"_Are you _crazy?_" Naruto hissed, "If those rogue nin behind us didn't know where we are, they'd know now."_

"_It is the only way for the village to let their guard down for us." The woman glared at him, "Not that I have any problem with _you_ going in without the signal."_

_He bared his teeth at her, but turned his head away and dropped to a defensive stance as he heard soft footsteps rushing to meet them._

"_Your Graces." A low voice suddenly purred through the rain, "Welcome home."_

* * *

He didn't know when he'd activated his Sharingan, but he was suddenly desperate to use it to locate Naruto's familiar signature. Which wasn't working. Mainly because he was still in his house, ripping his closet apart. A growl escaped his throat as he threw the last shirt across the room, then pounded down the stairs and out of the house, not caring that the door bounced back open when he slammed it shut and walked away.

Something about that letter had apparently hit him harder than he understood. Tsugi's words pushed at his mind until he wanted to dig a kunai into his forehead and forcibly remove the memory. What was it about Tsugi that got so goddamn far under his skin?

His footfalls were heavy on the dirt ground as he stormed the city center, people clearing out of his way as quickly as possible. Maybe it was the familiar annoyance, that he'd come to expect from Naruto, had become something he'd placed in Tsugi. A new vessel for overflowing emotions.

Yeah.

Something like that.

There was a flash of blonde and for a moment, he thought he'd found him, but the person turned and revealed a much older man. He shook his head, trying to clear it.

_I'm sending you a gift…_

Tsugi didn't send gifts. You were lucky if Tsugi could even remember what you were arguing about.

_See you on the other side._

Other side of what? Nothing about that letter made any sense to him. Much like the man, he supposed.

_**THERE**_. Familiar heat washed through him. Like he was drowning in desire with a thirst for something that could never be fulfilled. _Naruto._ He changed directions quickly, following his senses.

Why was he at the monument? And who was he—

_Sakura._

He growled, and drew up short. Through the trees, he could see two figures standing close together. The shorter, Sakura, brushed her shoulder against the taller and said something. Naruto's head turned and smiled down at her.

A real smile.

Sasuke's throat caught.

Her hand reached up, pushing a strand of hair from Naruto's face.

Sasuke growled.

They said something more, softly. God, he wished he could hear what they were talking about.

Then Sakura leaned up and kissed Naruto's cheek softly, before turning and moving away, letting her fingers drag down his arm before she vanished.

* * *

_The building they were led to was mostly dark, it's main hallway lit only by an occasional half-burned candle. Naruto could still smell and hear the rain, as they followed the Lord and Lady deeper into the shadows._

"_You are welcome to stay here tonight. But you will leave in the morning." There were no arguments, the Konoha nin were more than ready to turn around anyway. Naruto felt itchy, something wasn't right here._

_They entered a room at the end of the hall, massive, with tatami-mat floors and the barest of decorations. The Lord went to a small altar and bowed to it, as the Lady held back. Servants fell into the room, setting down two pillows. The Lady knelt gracefully into one, facing Naruto and the others._

"_Despite the trouble, thank you for getting us home." She said in a soft voice Naruto hadn't heard her use before. The Lord knelt into the other pillow, then gestured at them._

_They dropped to a sitting position, watching the two as the servants brought in steaming cups, placing one before everyone. Silence reined until they were gone._

"_Aren't you worried, Lord, about the nin attack?"_

"_We are safe in our walls."_

"_How can your walls protect you and your people from those owls? These aren't normal ninja you are dealing with."_

"_I do not believe that is any of your business, demon."_

_Naruto clutched his fist in his lap, "I believe it is, since we have to return the same way we came."_

"_Then perhaps you should sleep well tonight. Asahikage." A door slid open and a tall, slim man in dark robes entered, bowing to them, "Show these gentlemen to rooms."_

"_Yes, m'lord." The man looked at the group for a moment, before turning and heading out the way he came._

_Naruto rose, leading the others down another dark hallway._

**Something wrong.**

I know.

**Everything is off here.**

I know.

**So do something.**

Not yet.

_Kyuubi fell silent, though he could feel heat in his belly._

_He wondered, briefly, if he made their guide nervous when he growled as he stepped passed him into their guest quarters._

_He hoped so._

* * *

He heard her leave, and tried to ignore the other presence in his senses. His eyes scanned the names slowly, one right after the other, even though he'd memorized them so long ago. At least some things never changed.

Some things couldn't change.

And some things had to.

And he was learning that the hardest way.

There were too many things going on here, mixing him up. He couldn't stay focused any more, now that he was reminded of life. He'd grown into a routine, and now…now he was _here_. Now he was back among _living_. Where apparently he didn't have to look over his shoulder every second of the day.

But he knew he'd do it anyway.

Because there are some things you can't forget.

A tree branch snapped behind him, and silent footsteps approached.

There are some things that are just too hard to let go of.

**See you on the other side.**

Ch. 8 Fin.

Next Chapter: Illusions.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HELLS! FINISHED THIS JUST FOR YOU!

In case anyone's wondering, chapter titles are lines from songs.

"Big Machine" Goo Goo Dolls

"The No Seatbelt Song" Brand New

"To The End" My Chemical Romance

"Here's to the Night" Eve 6

"A Man And A Woman" U2

"Lonely Nation" Switchfoot

"The Phrase That Pays" The Academy Is…

"Lonely People" Augustana

I seriously suggest at least looking these songs up on YouTube…TAI, Augustana, and Brand New are just…guuuuuuuh *melt*

Ch 9 and 10 are both relatively short, so hopefully they won't take nearly as long to get up, and hopefully close together. The original plan was to get Ch 8 and 9 out together, before Anime Detour, which I'll be attending. IF YOU'RE GOING, COME FIIIIIIND ME! I'll be Tsunade with a sake bottle (and the ID of Crystal Child), and my sister will more than likely be in her totally over the top Kijin from YnM costume. Maybe I'll feel like dropping hints towards what's going to happen…


	9. I’m Losing You And It’s Effortless

**9/9/12: **I like that I have to do less editing in these later chapters. Gives me more attention into the mindset I was in when I started writing this story. Can't believe it's been 8 freaking years since it was first posted on And I'm still so hung up and guilty feeling about never finishing it. To be honest, I became a little over-obsessed with a certain MMO and let my creative side fall to the side.

And then the real world hit like a freight train. I've finally been able to convince myself to take a step back and go back to things that made me happy. Or frustrated. Like this damn story that haunts me in my dreams still.

Just a few more chapters to review, then hopefully I can drag this story back up from the bowels of hell it has fallen into.

**Original A/N:** Not really a whole lot to say this time around…welcome to chapter 9, hey, look, it's only been 2 months instead of half a year!

A lot of people expressed surprise at the hint of NejiSaku in the past chapter. Honestly, that's fine if you don't care for the pairing. I'm intrigued by it, that's all. But don't worry, it's not a big thing I'm going to touch on in YCNGHA, it was just a subtle mention, a showing of the passage of time. Things change, people change. In the 'today' society of Naruto, I doubt the pairing could ever actually work, with the strictness of the Hyuuga line, but just the thought that the interest was there was a nice step outside of the norm.

Oh, and Anime Detour was so much fun, I got to meet up with Questofdreams several times. She's so cute! Lol…she was just how I imagined her to look.

**DISCLAIMER**: I do NOT own Naruto or any characters therein associated with him. All are copyright Kishimoto-sensei. Thank you for your brief attention.

ENJOY!

**You Can Never Go Home Again  
Chapter Nine: I'm Losing You And It's Effortless**

_Honor thy dead._

* * *

_Mizuo lit a single lamp in the corner of the room, letting the shadows fill the rest. The team drew into that corner, gathering close, shoulders brushing. Naruto studied them all, eyes dark._

"_Things are happening." Sigume murmured. Konohamaru touched the white bandage covering his eye as the other continued, "It's not safe here."_

**Something is in the walls of the city.**

_Naruto didn't need the Kyuubi's thoughts to realize the situation. He sank down to a crouch, and traced the lines of the wood floor with his eyes, "I think…I think we've reached the end of the safe part of the trip."_

"_What do you mean, Naruto-niichan?"_

"_Something tells me…with our burden delivered…we're open targets now."_

_Toshio flipped his long hair over his shoulder, then leaned against the wall, "So what do we do?"_

"_Draw them away from the village."_

"_So we're not going home?" Konohamaru asked softly, and all eyes turned to Naruto._

_Naruto rose again, looking at each of them carefully, "Not yet."_

**They are not after these boys, Kit.**

I know.

**Don't trust anyone.**

I know that, too.

**And don't close your eyes tonight. The moon is whispering blood.**

_From their dark corner, no one saw the moon vanish behind dark clouds._

* * *

He debated on ignoring the person behind him. It would be so much easier to play the role of the dumb blonde and pretend his shinobi senses hadn't kicked in. Especially since the other was now a member of ANBU and could move like the wind itself.

But he knew Sasuke wasn't stupid.

"It isn't nice to spy." He stated after a long silence, "Especially not on old teammates."

He felt the other's warmth behind him, just out of arm's reach, "We should talk."

"There's not much to say right now."

"You had plenty to say to Sakura."

Was that a hint of jealousy? Naruto's eyebrow quirked. Inside him, Kyuubi stirred.

"Sakura is different."

"How so?"

"I can salvage something of myself with her."

"Wh-"

"Did you know…" He cut him off sharply, "That the Kyuubi is sealed inside me?"

Utter silence.

"And still quite active." He clasped his arms behind his back, and let his eyes blindly go over the rows of names again, "I can tell quite a lot of things beyond human senses. I can tell there was a fire in the grocery market last week. I can tell you a woman is giving birth to a baby girl ½ a mile from here." He turned to look at Sasuke, "And I can tell…you gave up on me."

"No." It was firm, but soft. Too soft.

"It's okay, Sasuke." He smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes, "No need to lie. I could smell him on you."

Sasuke stiffened, eyes going only a fraction wider. Naruto could hear Sasuke's heartbeat as he took a step closer. And then something else caught his interest. His eyes narrowed sharply.

He wasn't sure if it was Kyuubi or himself who issued the growl.

"Who have you been in contact with?"

Sasuke frowned, "No one."

_Liar._

"I came straight here from the house."

_I can smell him._ His eyes traveled over Sasuke's body, _who have you been visiting, Sasuke? _His hands were giving off the scent, _Who have you been touching? Have you betrayed us all this time?_

He turned on his heel and walked away.

Sasuke called out, tried to say something to him.

But all he heard were the silences in between.

* * *

_They heard movement outside, an hour before sunrise, long after they'd doused the lamps and moved to look asleep. Naruto was the first to open his eyes, and staring across the room, met the glimmer of Mizuo's. He gave a slight nod, and the boy rose, silent, and crossed to the rice paper door._

_There was no other noise for a long period, and Mizuo seemed like he was ready to drop his guard soon. But the moon outside flashed a beam of light between the clouds, and then the room exploded into a silent flurry of movement. They were all on their feet in a matter of seconds, as the door spilled open and closed._

_Naruto saw no one, but he could smell them. Something the others couldn't. The air smelled like rotting fruit, but the scent rolled away from him._

"_SIGUME!" The boy dodged, just as an invisible limb slammed into the wall he'd been close to. Wood cracked, the floor squeaked. Naruto ducked and swung his foot out, and felt the passing breeze as it barely missed fabric. His foot hit the ground and he rolled instantly, as kunai appeared where his other foot had been. He lunged, felt his fingers grasp fabric, and twisted. He pulled the weight over his shoulder, slamming the invisible being onto the floor in front of him._

_And then they weren't invisible anymore._

_It was a man, clearly older than the group, despite being hidden in cloth much too similar to their first attacker to be comfortable. The man lay stunned for a brief moment, before he swung his legs out and tossed himself back to his feet._

"_So you broke it."_

"_No." Naruto replied, "You did."_

"_Smart." The man ducked as a foot flew towards his head, then twisted out of reach and back towards the door, "But not smart enough." His fingers flew into hand seals. Ones Naruto didn't know._

_It was a human act, to watch the fingers form seals. Naruto should have known better than to be human._

_And then the man smiled, "Nurikomeru*!"_

_Naruto was getting really tired of falling into darkness._

* * *

He didn't know where he was going, just knowing that he had to get away from Sasuke. In the end, he went to the one place he knew Sasuke wouldn't go.

Sakura opened her front door, her face showing only minor surprise at seeing him again so soon, "Did you decide to take me up on the offer?"

He smiled at her, "I'm sorry. Guess I'm still as stupid as I was. Do you mind if I stay here tonight?"

Her face softened and she leaned against the edge of her door, "Of course not. I didn't think we were done with our talking anyway."

"Far from it." He nodded, then stepped in cautiously when she gestured for him to enter.

Sakura lived in a small apartment, the front door opened to a small living room with the kitchen split off from it only by a marble-topped counter. The bright red walls were offset by golden-framed paintings of summery scenes and a dark wood entertainment stand, filled with books and a radio with rather large speakers. The couch and over-stuffed chair in the center of the room were a dark leather, and at the moment looked rather too appeasing to him. Off along the opposite wall was a hallway, which he assumed led to the bathroom and her bedroom.

He slipped his shoes off, then followed her as she went to the kitchen, "I was just making tea." She pulled a large black and red kettle from the heat, and poured the steaming water into a teapot, "Take a seat, Naruto, I'll bring it in."

"So homely, Sakura-chan." He smiled and did as she asked, still looking around, "I like it."

She brought the tea over on a tray, serving them both a steaming cup, before sitting in the chair, smiling easily at him, "I'm glad you're home, Naruto."

"Yeah." A hesitant second, "Me too."

"We all are. It's better to know you're safe. You never contacted us."

"There wasn't time."

"There was an entire year of time."

He looked up at her with his ice-cool eyes. Sitting in a chair that seemed too big for her petit frame, her green eyes looked wild to him. But he couldn't read them. He felt the space, then. The vast valley they'd have to cross to meet again.

She was made of iron, he was made of dust. She could make it to the middle in one piece. He would have to put his faith in the invisible and hope there was enough of him left to be recognizable when they could meet again.

The moment was fragile, so he said simply, "It would jeopardize everything."

She didn't ask what he meant. Instead, she threw him off balance, "What did Sasuke want?"

He hadn't thought she'd known he was there. He couldn't meet her eyes, "To open old scars." _To fill our wounds with salt._

"He wants his best friend back." She said softly, lowering her eyes to her cup, "Everyone knows, you're the only one to take his walls down."

"Am I?" He couldn't stop himself from rising to his feet, "I don't know. It seems like he's made some friends while I was away?"

"If he did," she watched him circle the couch and start pacing, "It's because you broke him out of that lonely corner he'd tucked himself into."

He turned to look at her, "Who was he? I saw his picture."

"Naruto."

"At least give me a name."

"This is something you should be asking him." She sipped her tea then set it back on the tray, "It's not my place to tell you."

"I can't ask him." He circled back to his seat and lowered himself into the soft fabric, "I can't talk to him. He doesn't want to hear what I say."

"Maybe because everything you say to him is in anger." She reached out, a soft, pale hand on his, a sharp contrast of femininity against his tan, hard hand, "He's only human, Naruto."

His eyes met hers and he realized she knew. She knew about them. About what they had been. A cold feeling washed through him and sank into his stomach like a stone. She knew, and for some reason that made him angry. So, they hadn't been a secret. Or they had and Sasuke had let it go. Naruto felt that valley widen.

"_Talk_ to him. Talk to me. I've missed you, Naruto. And…it feels like you're still not here."

"You don't care?" She blinked, looked confused, "About him. And me. You're so calm."

"I came to terms. It's been a long time since I found out."

"Found out?"

"Figured it out." She withdrew her hand and clasped it in her lap with her other one, "When he started hanging out with Tsugi."

_Tsugi._ He had a name to the face now. A name to the scent.

"How would that give anything away?"

Sakura smiled, albeit a little sadly, "Because he looked like you. Acted a lot like you. And Sasuke tolerated his touches. Like he'd been used to them all along." Her eyes rose to him again, "And he had been. Because he was still seeing you."

He didn't have much to say to her after that. They talked quietly about mundane things, she caught him up on friends' lives, he told her jokes he'd learned. In the well lit room, he pushed his shadows to the corners until she went to the closet and got him a blanket and pillows.

When she said good night as she flipped off the lights, she meant it.

_Because he was still seeing you._ He turned those words around, held them up in the obscure shadows, and tried to understand what she meant. Sasuke wasn't brainless, he'd known what he was doing with the other blonde.

In the darkness, the walls were oozing blood. And he was sure he could smell the rotting bodies that haunted his nightmares. He buried his head in the pillow, and wished Sakura's light scent would mask the sharpness of the scent of his memories.

* * *

_There were gentle fingers in his hair, "Naruto. It's time to get up." That warm voice, a tone he'd never heard before._

_His eyes opened slowly, and took a moment to adjust to the brightly-lit room. Sasuke leaned back on the bed, shirtless. Naruto frowned, sitting up, "Where am I? What happened?"_

"_What are you talking about? You're in my room. You and Kiba had a drinking bet last night. You both lost."_

_He looked around, hand on his forehead, "Last night? But what about the mission?"_

_Sasuke frowned, "Mission? Are you feeling okay? We've been on leave for the past week." Sasuke reached out, pushing Naruto's fingers off his forehead and replaced them with his own. They were cold, and familiar and quite welcome. They slid into his hair._

_Soft lips met his. For a second, he relaxed. But this wasn't Sasuke. The personality was all wrong. He pushed himself backwards, pushed till his back hit the headboard._

"_Naruto?"_

"_What the hell is going on? Who are you?"_

"_What are you talking about?"_

_Naruto rose, standing on the mattress, "You're not Sasuke. You haven't insulted me once."_

_The face was blank, watching with those black, black eyes, "That's not funny, Naruto."_

"_Stop this, whoever you are. Get the fuck out of my head."_

"_You're not making any sense, Naruto." Hands reached out and tugged at his wrist, "Come on, lay back down…that alcohol must have done something screwy with your head."_

_He pulled out of the grip, "Stop touching me." He backed over to the other side of the bed and jumped down, "You're not him. What's going on?"_

_Sasuke rose, head tilted to the side, "I think you need a head examination, Naruto. Let's go see the Hokage, if this has you so freaked. Maybe she can talk some sense into you."_

"_Yes. Let's go see Tsunade-baba." He couldn't turn his back to this not-Sasuke, not even as he climbed onto the windowsill. The not-Sasuke didn't move, simply watched him._

_So he turned, and fled._

Ch. 9 Fin.

*Nurikomeru = To Seal

Next Chapter: Illusions.


	10. The Best Part of “Believe” Is The “lie”

**9/10/12: **For the record, current stats for the story from are: Total hits: 44,191 c2s: 19 Favorites: 160 Watches: 235 And I STILL get at least 1-2 favorites or watches notifications every week. _

**Original A/N:** Good god…was looking at the stats for this fic over at FF and…man, I hadn't realized how many ppl had it favorited or alerted. THANK YOU! I love you all. Here's Chapter 10, coz it's relatively short and I love you.

For those who are curious, stats at the moment stand at 10 c2s listings, 68 favs and 100 watchers. God, that just blows my mind. And those stats are from right before I post chapter 9.

Once again, an entire chapter in italics, super-duper short, but super-duper important.

**DISCLAIMER**: I do NOT own Naruto or any characters therein associated with him. All are copyright Kishimoto-sensei. Thank you for your brief attention.

ENJOY!

**You Can Never Go Home Again  
Chapter Ten: The Best Part of "Believe" Is The "lie"**

_You are already chained to me._

* * *

_Things were far from right. No one acknowledged him. Things seemed weird, the settings seemed all wrong. Konoha was not Konoha._

_The not-Sasuke met him in the streets, looking all the world like he'd been waiting forever for him to appear._

"_I still think those drinks have gone to your head." The dark-haired person spoke, shaking his head and tucking his hands casually behind his back, "It's like you're forgetting everything."_

"_You're not Sasuke!" He lunged at the person, who sidestepped him._

"_Of course I am, who else would I be?"_

_His head hurt. And Kyuubi was awfully quiet._

_He stilled where he was, watching the not-Sasuke watch him._

_Images flitted through his mind. People. Konohamaru…Mizuo…Sigume…Toshio…he reached for the memory tied to those names, but it fell through his fingers like sand in a sieve._

_Konoha's sun burned as cold, pale fingers touched his cheek, "I'm exactly who I should be. The way you want me to be."_

_Naruto pushed the hand away, "Don't fucking touch me." His fingers felt for his kunai, but came up empty. _

_The not-Sasuke smiled at him, as if reading his mind, "You can't hurt me, Naruto-kun. You never have before."_

"_Who the hell are you?!"_

_The person smirked, "The person who wants to give you everything." A pale hand stretched out towards him, palm open, fingers splayed, "Because everything ends in you."_

_Naruto felt his muscles lock and his eyes widened, "What are yo—"_

"_You belong to me."_

_Black mist exploded from not-Sasuke's hand and filled his ears with terrible howling noises as it ripped the world out from under his still frozen feet._

* * *

_The first thing he could remember was the soft heat of Kyuubi. It was comforting, somehow, to hear Kyuubi's breaths._

_And then he remembered the not-Sasuke and forced his eyes open. Not that it made any difference, as he was met with darkness._

"_Kyuubi?" His voice echoed somewhere far, far away. He waited, but there was no reply, though he could still hear the breathing. He stayed where he was, and tried to make his mind focus. He couldn't tell if he was laying down or standing. He couldn't feel any surface, and realized when he tried to move, he could move in all directions. Like he was floating._

_Something flashed by him, and he spun quickly to follow it, but it vanished just as he focused on it again. He stayed there, watching the spot he swore it'd vanished at. Another flash flew over his shoulder. Then another, and at least ten more, and soon the darkness was filled with brilliant flashes of something silver, all vanishing into a point far away._

_He tried to take a step, and felt ground materialize. He kept moving, then, certain he was doing the right thing. The shooting star-like objects grew more intense, until he had to cover his eyes from the brilliance of the point they were all diving into._

"_Naruto?"_

_His eyes flew open and the world materialized as the Hokage's office. Tsunade was staring at him from behind her desk._

"_Tsunade-baba." He glanced around, "How did I get here?"_

"_That's what I want to know. And why are you here? Aren't you on a mission?"_

"_What?" Mission? He couldn't remember, "I—I don't know…"_

_Her eyebrow quirked, "You don't…know?"_

_There was a knock at the door and Sasuke walked in. Naruto tensed. No, it was the not-Sasuke. He threw a quick glance at Tsunade. Surely she'd notice…_

"_Sorry, Tsunade-sama, Naruto escaped my sights for a moment." Not-Sasuke smiled._

_Kami, this was getting weird._

"_It's fine, I need him anyway." The blonde brushed her hair out of her eyes and gestured to her guest chairs. Naruto sat cautiously, leaning as far away from the not-Sasuke as possible. Why couldn't Tsunade see this person was an imposter?_

"_Naruto-kun." Tsunade rose, hands planted firmly on the desktop, "Things are changing. It's almost time." She smiled and he thought, for an instant, her eyes flashed silver._

"_You don't understand it now…but you will. You and your new team…you are the key."_

"_What?"_

"_Pretty soon, the Dream will end, Naruto." Tsunade rounded the desk and leaned against it, "and then…" she smiled._

_He saw her eyes change, and this time, they stayed silver. She leaned forward._

"_Take my warning, Naruto." Her voice dropped in pitch, and her face morphed, taking on masculine features, "You are the key, and all the pieces are falling together."_

_Long, silver hair._

"_Who are you?!" He tried to stand, but couldn't move._

_Pale fingers wrapped around the armrest of his chair and all he could see were those silver eyes._

"_Listen to me, child of the Kitsune. This is your only warning." This stranger pulled away, and moved towards the not-Sasuke, "The world is changing, everything you had…"_

_Those pale fingers touched the not-Sasuke's cheek, as the stranger stepped behind the boy, "everything you are…"_

_Huge, huge wings filled the room, made it impossible for him to tear his eyes away. Pale arms wrapped around not-Sasuke's neck. _

"_Everything you love is mine."_

* * *

Ch. 10 Fin.

Told ya, short. Important. Off to bed for me. I love you all, thank you for your continued support.

Next Chapter: Jealousy. The night watch.


	11. You Don't Wear My Chains

**9/13/12**: Well, unlike my original A/N (below), I did not go rewrite chapter 1, I just tweaked it, haha.

**Original A/N:** Starting this, I feel like there's going to be a long Author's Note, lol. I want to rewrite chapter 1. It's got so many errors in it, it hurts my head to read it. But I won't do it while I've got a chapter forcing it's way through my head. So maybe after I let this chapter sit for you guys for a while.

I hate that I'm loosing readers. I really am trying to push out new chapters faster. Got it down to a month instead of half a year…that's a good thing, right? But for those of you sticking with me, or who have just discovered YCNGHA _thank you_. Even those of you not reviewing, but favoriting the story on FFnet, _thank you thank you thank you._

_Questofdreams_ – hahahaha, I'm tzuki, from the sasuxnaru IRC channel. I was the Tsunade who was all hyper to meet you and I could read your face as "wtf, who is this?"

_WhiteTigress666_ – You're supposed to be confused. Part of my diabolical plan to take over the world.

_Cheska_ – You've brought up a wonderful point that even I hadn't noticed, lol, in mentioning their sanity. Reading back over it, I'm surprised I've been subconsciously writing like that XD. And I have the very last scene figured out, should wrap up the story fabulously, however, I've only got 2 more chapters after this one planned, lol, so I need to get my rear in gear and develop the outline for the rest of the story.

**DISCLAIMER**: I do NOT own Naruto or any characters therein associated with him. All are copyright Kishimoto-sensei. Thank you for your brief attention.

ENJOY!

**You Can Never Go Home Again  
Chapter Eleven: You Don't Wear My Chains**

He had followed. He wanted to understand, and, for a moment, he had been so _sure_ things would be okay. For those few seconds, he had thought things could pick up somewhere close to where they had left off.

"_I could smell him on you."_

He'd known about the Kyuubi. There'd been a short while where the Council had debated the missing nin as security risks, and when he had stood up (okay, shown up, since he hadn't _said_ anything), the truth of the demon had slipped.

He'd known, but had never considered the demon might have integrated into Naruto.

"_I think the real question is…did you ever think of me?"_

That had stung. But watching the door close had _hurt_.

He had certain things to say to the dobe, but the other wanted nothing more than to be away from him.

Because of a single, stupid, mistake.

Now he had to watch Naruto seek out Sakura. Watching them vanish inside almost made him wish Uzumaki Naruto had never kissed him. Questions, questions, all he wanted to do was grab the dobe, shake him and demand he _listen_.

Instead, he sat and watched the lights in Sakura's apartments, and stayed long after those lights went out.

* * *

_He really shouldn't have felt as pleased as he did to see the black eye Tsugi was sporting. He knew he shouldn't even care, but he just couldn't help the smirk that kept trying to fight its way to the surface every time he saw the bastard._

_It was bad, he knew. But he just felt so _proud_ he'd caught the damn teen off-guard. Though, how the blonde hadn't seen the fist coming after the stunt he'd pulled, Sasuke'd never understand._

_Of course, his glum satisfaction was destroyed seconds after the thought, by remembering what had spawned the need to punch the dirty blonde. He shot a glare at said boy, who was currently watching him from across the hall in front of the Hokage's office. He was oh so tempted to knock the current smirk off that boy's lips._

Naruto.

_His eyes widened only a fraction, hardly noticeable, and he had to look away. Damn. He hadn't thought he'd be this bothered by Naruto's absence._

The idiot better be on his way back. He's late.

_Late by a few days, which didn't really surprise him._

Maybe something has happened.

_He pushed that thought hard, tried to get it to go away, but something nagged at him._

"_What'cha thinking about?"_

_Sasuke blinked, then looked up. Tsugi wasn't across from him anymore. Oh no, he was _next_ to him. He stared at the other nin for a brief moment, then looked away again, not answering._

"_Better question." He felt the other's body lean closer to him, "_Who_ are ya thinking about?" He heard him grin, but didn't rise to the bait, "Is it me? Bet it is. After all, I am tall, dark and handsome."_

"_You're blonde."_

"_HA! So you _have_ noticed."_

_Sasuke turned his head to stare at him. Tsugi just grinned, "Someone told me I look like some local kid. You know him?"_

I've kissed him.

"_Apparently he's off on some big escort mission or something." Tsugi leaned away, and Sasuke relaxed just a little as the body heat lessened, "I hope he hurries back, I want to meet my twin."_

"_He's not your twin."_

"_Oh? So you do know him?" He leaned in again._

_Sasuke rose, crossing the hall to take up Tsugi's former spot. Crossing his arms over his chest, he glared at the Hokage's door. Why oh why hadn't she called them in yet._

"_Is it true then? Are we similar?"_

_If he didn't look at him, he didn't have to acknowledge him._

"Look at me!"

_He cursed mentally as that voice filtered through. _Stop thinking about him._ Tsugi wasn't helping the situation, just by bringing Naruto up he was affecting Sasuke more than he could understand. But if he didn't look at him, he could tune him out. He could drift into the happy world of—_

_The Hokage's door swung open, the busty woman looked between the two of them, then smiled._

_He didn't care much for that smile._

"_Hello, boys! Come on in! We're all ready."_

_Okay…he definitely didn't like that look in her eyes either.  
_

* * *

The world was awash in fire. Heat burned at his skin, tore down his tallest walls and battered at him. He swung a fist out, and deep laughter rumbled around him. The heat dissipated and was replaced by a warm, dark room.

He opened his blue eyes and looked up to meet burning red ones.

**Hello, Kit.**

"Kyuubi." He glanced around, "Why did you drag me here?"

**Better than your nightmares, no?** A long breath of warm air as the Kyuubi exhaled, **And it's been a long time.**

"Too bad it wasn't longer." The fox demon huffed but other than that appeared unaffected by the comment, "Have you…" he trailed off and looked at the ground.

**Yes.**

Deep blue shot up again, "Are they coming?"

**Yes.**

He shivered a little, wrapping one arm around himself, "Will they bring this to Konoha?"

**Most likely.**

"On Sasuke…earlier…I smelled…"

_**Him**_**. **Kyuubi did _not_ sound pleased. It shifted in its cage and issued a low grumbling noise.

"So he's been here. San has infiltrated the village."

**They'll destroy you, Kit. They'll destroy _us_.**

Naruto smiled, "Just like they promised, ne?"

The Kyuubi chuckled, and flopped down on the floor, **Just like we asked them to.**

* * *

_Long, sharp fingernails drew across the not-Sasuke's neck. Naruto couldn't help watching the long thin line of blood that formed. The silver-haired man smiled at him._

"_Soon enough, you'll realize the mistakes." He straightened, wings ruffling in the room that just seemed to keep shrinking, "Maybe one day." Footsteps across the hard floor, "One day you will be ready…"_

_His heartbeat quickened as that tall body leaned in, fingers clutching tightly to the chair._

"_To accept my _mercy._"_

_His eyes widened and his body reacted. Fingers flew into seals of their own accord. The silver-haired man just kept smiling._

_Not-Sasuke, however, was the last thing he saw, before he closed his eyes and screamed._

* * *

He woke to fingers in his hair and the soft sound of someone humming. At first, when he opened his eyes, he was met with total darkness, but that was just the night, and it soon evened out to give him the figure of Sakura, perched on the edge of the couch.

"Why are you up?" He asked, voice croaking.

"You were having a nightmare, I think." She answered, a cool sound that calmed his nerves, "I thought maybe I could help just a little."

He smiled at her and pulled her fingers from his hair, kissing one gently before he let her go and pulled himself up, "I'm alright. You can go back to bed."

She watched him, he could see her green eyes even in the dark room.

"Talk to him, Naruto."

He tensed again.

"You'll both feel better."

He shrugged, "There's not enough to say."

"There is a years worth of words waiting to be said." She took his hand and squeezed it, "Even if…things don't work out…don't leave it like this. Just _try_."

"I did try!" He snarled, "I...Do you know how many times I…I…" he ripped his hand away and rubbed his chest, casting his eyes downward, "You don't understand, Sakura."

"You're right. I don't. Neither does he. So you have to _make_ it all make sense. If nothing else, we're your _friends_, Naruto."

"_Where are your friends now, Naruto-kun?"_

He liked how she said his name. He held on to that.

Ch. 11 Fin.

I've also started a rework of _Hear Me_, since I went back to reread it and couldn't stand what I'd written. It all read too…kiddish. Not my style anymore. So I've got an entire story for that one, but it's going to be a new name. Title is still a work in progress, current winning title is _So Long and Good Night_, but we'll see. Told myself I was going to finish this chapter before I even went and wrote a line of it.

Next Chapter: "Who sent you?" and "Who is he?"


	12. Too Late

**9/16/12: **And here it is…I'm caught up…and ready to go back to writing the next chapter. Changed a single line in this chapter and turned Kannon into Lord Kannon. :D But this story is now eating my brain and I think I shall write the next part and post it and these edits all up together. If I have it in me, I'll go next chapter too. We'll see. Ja ne!

**Original A/N:** Just moved. No net. What better way to waste my days before I start my new job then to push out an overdue chapter? Also working on _So Long and Good Night_. Two fics open at the same time, just kind of writing for one of them when inspiration hits.

It has been three and a half years since I started writing this fic. Three long, long years, with spans of months without updates. Stupid Real Life. I'm not even sure if posting any more of this will hold anyone's attention like it did in the past, as I know a lot of the fandom has died down (at least the original crowd I used to run/IRC with). So for those of you who are new to the fic, welcome, for any old-timers, welcome back, I've missed you too.

This is the big, monumental chapter. The last one I have plotted out completely with the big wtf ending. The next chapter is going to be an intermission (coughfluffsmutcough), and then hopefully I'll have pulled my head out of my lazy ass and finished organizing the rest.

I also want to apologize if my fight scenes aren't the greatest, I'm not very good at them, despite all the classes I took on fighting and choreography, it's still just hard to put into good words. (Okay, it's not much of a fight, haha, but yeah…)

**DISCLAIMER**: I do NOT own Naruto or any characters therein associated with him. All are copyright Kishimoto-sensei. Thank you for your brief attention.

ENJOY!

**You Can Never Go Home Again  
Chapter Twelve: Too Late **

_The world shook and shattered, in the midst of untangling himself from the image of Not-Sasuke's blood._

"_Naruto!"_

_Blue eyes flew open and the world had reset itself. His team…he wasn't in Konoha. He was…_

_He was still here._

_So startled, he let out a noise when he was tackled to the floor by Sigume. The boy rose over him, glancing down at him then across the room, "You awake yet?" the normally quiet boy asked, "He's got some sort of binding skill…illusionary techniques."_

_Itachi flew to mind, but he pushed the thought aside. If it was Itachi, Sigume wouldn't have had time to push him down. Naruto pushed himself up as Sigume rolled off of him and the sharp sound of kunai meeting kunai snapped through the room._

_He felt separated from his body as he watched Toshio be thrown hard into the wall. He felt out of his own control as the strange ninja launched himself towards the blonde. He felt like he just had to lean his body slightly and dodged the man's attack._

_But then he fell back into himself as the dodge slipped and he hit the floor on his arm, hard, sliding a bit._

"_You're not much, are you, Foxy? Even with a whole group of you, this is going to be easy." A foot met his gut and sent Naruto across the rest of the small space, meeting the wall with his back._

_He felt, more than saw Konohamaru's charge._

_This man was good and agile, easily deflecting Konohamaru's desperate attack, but he wasn't prepared when Konohamaru, Toshio and Sigume descended upon him._

_Something was still wrong. Naruto couldn't get control of his body to help. He felt in a daze, the world a little blurry and warm around the edges._

**Kit.**

_The world zoomed to focus so suddenly, he stumbled and hit the wall. He felt hot. On fire. Heat flooded his veins, and he felt himself _change. _His flow of chakra reversed, and he stumbled again, reaching for something to support himself._

Kyuubi…what are you doing to me?

_But the fox demon did not answer. His answer was the sight of his fingers, his nails growing into sharp points._

No. Stop.

**Calm. **_Kyuubi's voice thundered into his mind, _**It will be alright.**

What are you doing? How are you—

**The bars on this cage are wide enough. Be strong, I am not the enemy now.**

_He cringed, but the fox forced his eyes to open, and the world was unnaturally in focus. And he thought he was watching everything in slow motion._

_Sigume hit a pillar in the wall, cringing and slamming into the ground._

_Naruto's body moved._

_The nin didn't stand a chance when the clawed hand found it's way around his neck._

* * *

The sun was barely breaking over the walls of Konoha when Naruto stepped out of Sakura's apartment. He'd left her sleeping on the couch, where she'd seemed determined to keep residence, attempting guardianship from his nightmares.

He barely managed to meet Sasuke's eyes when the nin met him less than fifteen feet from the building. But he managed, and he held the gaze. Silence thundered.

Finally, an eon later, he broke the gaze and moved, brushing past Sasuke. The other followed, like Naruto knew he would.

"So you'll stay with her?"

"_Talk to him, Naruto."_

"It's the safest place for me to be."

"You're safe with me."

He halted, Sasuke stopping far too close behind him.

"You're the most dangerous person here."

Tense. Careful, careful, the world is on the edge of breaking down.

"I'm not a threat to you." Sasuke's words were soft, carefully chosen.

Naruto closed his eyes for a moment, trying to recenter himself, "You always have been."

He barely dodged when Sasuke's arm shot out, fist trying to connect with Naruto's head. He spun, eyes guarded, meeting Sasuke's black gaze.

"I don't want to be the threat that makes you act this way, Naruto. Tell me what you want. Tell me how to bring it back."

He looked at him, jaw clenching, studied him. _Stranger._

"Tell me what happened while I was gone."

* * *

"_Who sent you?"_

_The nin struggled against the firm grasp, made a gurgling noise as Naruto felt the nails puncture skin and the warm trickle of blood found his hand._

"_Naru—"_

"Who sent you_?"_

_There was a hacking noise, another sound as his grip tightened and he felt the throat give a little. He unleashed a roar and threw the other across the room, seeing red as he followed the ninja's flight with a graceful move and pinned the man with a knee._

"_M…m…mercy."_

_He was goddamn tired of that answer, and roared, red chakra ripping through his arm, the man under him managed a scream through the red-hot pain that must have ripped through him when that hand found his throat again._

"_Who? Who the _fuck_ is this 'Mercy'?"_

**I wonder if he knows he's going to die.**_ A small smirk hit the corner of his mouth._

_For a second, Naruto fought against the demonic thought. Everyone knew he wasn't one for mindless murder._

**Is it mindless if you're only protecting yourself and your team?**

_A weak hand pulled at his arm, terror in the eyes of the man under him. He loosened his grip enough to hear a struggled, liquid breath. Eyes focused and unfocused, and the nin said a word he didn't catch. He hissed, and the man arched a little under him, before dark eyes settled back to his blazing ones._

"_K…Kannon. Lord Kannon."_

* * *

Sasuke shrugged.

Somehow, Naruto knew that would be the first response. The uncharacteristic lift and fall of sharp shoulders. He focused for a moment on the ANBU tattoo on the tiny patch of bare skin he could see between Sasuke's shirt and arm wraps, before he dragged his eyes back up, meeting the ever impossible to read black orbs.

"It wasn't all that exciting."

"Judging from what I've seen," Naruto's eyes flashed dangerously, "I'd say there were a few big things going on."

"Dobe. It's not what it looks like."

"How do you know what it looks like to me? Because it's not just looks." Naruto took a step closer to him, "It's scent. You _know_."

Sasuke was silent, but nodded, an ever quick, barely noticeable, jerk of the head.

"I can sense enough of the story to get the general gist. But I'm willing to hear your version."

"He wasn't…" Sasuke started, shifted, "I didn't…" Naruto quirked an eyebrow, "It's not like…"

And then, because Naruto figured karma wanted to keep him its bitch, they were distracted. An ANBU swept in, stopping Sasuke in mid-stumble with their simple landing. The nin swept off a mask, looking between the two of them, then focusing on Sasuke, "Uchiha-san! The gates!"

They both tensed, Sasuke's hands instantly going to his weapons holsters.

But the ANBU didn't look panicked, he looked…almost happy.

"They're at the gates!"

* * *

Thwop.

Thhhwop.

_He was going to kill him. Slowly._

Thwop.

_Painfully._

Thwop.

_And he was going to shove that fucking ball so far down Tsugi's throat the fucker would shit rainbow colored marbles as he died._

Thwop.

_Forty-five minutes after escaping the Hokage's office, he'd been hoping to find a little peace and quiet. Alone. That whole concept seemed so incredibly far away now._

Thwop.

_Instead, here he was, in some fucking side street with the reincarnation of the Wonder Blonde, who was throwing that god-forsaken_ ball_ against the fence._

Thhhwop.

"_So…"_

Thwop.

_Where the hell had he even gotten the thing?_

"_I think we should leave as soon as possible."_

Thwop.

_He tried, he really did try to ignore the other._

"_Maybe tonight?"_

_Nighttime departure. Could be best to make some ground and loose any possible trails. On the other hand…it was a _mission_ with _him.

Thwop.

"_How about in an hour? The sooner we leave, the sooner we get back, and all that."_

_Something in him stung. Where the hell was Naruto? He was getting too late, it was taking too long. Sasuke feared his premonitions were right. Maybe something had gone horribly wrong…_

Thwop.

_That fucking ball had better not be making the trip with them._

* * *

He followed. He shouldn't have, but he did. Trailing just behind Sasuke, letting the ANBU have Point. But Sasuke didn't seem too worried, and there was no tension in the air at the gates.

They stopped at the outer edges of the crowd, Sasuke pulling people out of the way to fight through the crowd. A bad feeling sunk into Naruto.

**Odd to have a crowd.**

_May be someone important._

The Kyuubi snorted, and Naruto felt inclined to agree.

He was too busy musing with the fox demon to notice when Sasuke stopped, and found himself crashing into his shoulder blade.

"What the he—" He trailed off as the air around him finally registered. He froze. _That scent._

Kyuubi growled.

Sasuke tensed as someone approached in front of him.

And then, the noise of the crowd died.

That bad feeling roared into a deeper, darker sensation when Sasuke slipped a step farther from him. It only took one word for the year to rush into the space between the two.

"Tsugi."

Ch. 12 Fin.

It's short. But it's _done_. And I hate the ending. But it's 4am and I'm sooooo out of it.

Next Chapter: SasuNaru fluff. Yeah, I said SasuNaru, not NaruSasu. Maybe a bit of both. Haven't decided. After that…well, the story is still kind of undecided. Feel free to share any thoughts on what you think should happen, may help, may not. If there's even anyone for this story anymore.


	13. Interlude: You Are The Blood In My Veins

**A/N: **I am so rusty. I'm so so so so so sorry.

This story is EIGHT years old, holy crap. And I'm still haunted by never finishing it (I am also amazed to see it still averages at least 50 hits every month _ ). So here. I went through and edited all the past chapters, getting myself back into the mode of it, and now I'm presenting this…forgive me and enjoy.

Also, not italicized, but definitely part of the "past" storyline.

Listen to "The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot" by Brand New to get the full power of the lyrics

**You Can Never Go Home Again**

**Interlude: You Are The Blood In My Veins**

_If it makes you less sad  
I will die by your hand  
I hope you find out what you want  
I already know what I am_

Love is not.

But it can be.

He didn't wake up in love. He didn't wake up in like. There was no sudden realization that hey, Sasuke was beautiful. He just…_was_. There was no moment where cupid's arrow struck. Instead, there was a life that simply evolved.

Maybe it wasn't even love.

But it was something. It was an existence. That thin line between 'love' and 'hate'. Because he wanted to be a moment.

Naruto just wanted to _be._

_And if it makes you less sad  
We'll start talking again  
And you can tell me how vile  
I already know that I am_

The wound was drawing blood. Shit, that was going to scar. He issued a low growl and spun, looking angrily through the bushes. When he got his hands on that stupid blonde boy…

He froze as orange shot through his vision, then ducked, barely missing the blond barreling through the trees. This move, apparently, confused Naruto. Sasuke smirked and swung out.

Fist met flesh in a silent noise that pushed an "Ooof!" out of Naruto just before he ate dirt.

There was silence for a minute, and when it became apparent the blonde wasn't going to get up quickly, Sasuke lent his weight to a tree, tentatively touching the wound on his arm.

"Ne, Sasuke…" Naruto sounded winded still, "If you never kill Itachi-"

Sasuke's eyes shot into daggers and stared at Naruto's prone figure.

"What would you do?"

He stared at him until the blonde rolled over and looked at him, before answering "Never is not an option."

"Then what will you do in the meantime?"

_I'll grow old  
And start acting my age  
I'll be a brand new day  
In a life that you hate_

There was never a time where Sasuke thought of Naruto as 'handsome' or 'beautiful' or even 'attractive'. But there were moments, rare (but still he knew they existed) where Naruto would wisen up. Where his eyes would take on a blue that seemed so much older than the teen's self.

In moments where Naruto would let his guard down, they could be lonely together. Because they were. It wasn't the same type of lonely, and it never would be, but it was something they had in common.

Sometimes Sasuke wondered what would have happened to both of them had they not been chosen for Team 7. He figured he'd either be ANBU or dead at this point. And Naruto…there were so many offshoots for Naruto.

Sasuke never lied to himself. Naruto was different. As much as he hated (furiously, _passionately_ hated) to think it, deep down, he could feel Naruto was…_special_, even if sometimes that ended with 'Ed'. But Naruto was going to _be_ something to people.

Even if at the moment all he was, was a nuisance.

And Sasuke would see it, sometimes. In words, in actions.

And sometimes he wondered if he'd regret it.

Allies were useful.

Friends were dangerous.

_A crown of gold  
A heart that's harder than stone  
And it hurts a whole lot  
But it's missed when it's gone  
_

It seemed somehow appropriate that it was raining the first time he'd kissed Sasuke. Well…the first REAL time…and he _TECHNICALLY_ hadn't kissed Sasuke...And it wasn't just raining. It was pouring. It was torrential, flooding rains that Konoha occasionally suffered in the wet season.

The practice field was more dangerous than normal, as Naruto balanced on a branch in one of the many trees surrounding the clearing, catching his breath. There was the soft movement of fabric, barely audible above the rainfall, and he had barely an instant to dodge the kunai that landed in the tree where his shoulder had been.

He growled softly. _Stupid Sasuke-teme._

He rolled around the trunk of another tree and glanced up at the sky, wishing the rain would stop. But, he supposed, he could see the point in continuing training. Not all battles were won in bright sunny weather.

He slipped a kunai out of his holster and held his breath, hunting. Kyuubi purred and warmed him a little against the cold setting into his wet clothing, then directed his attention to neon-pink hair. Naruto smirked.

Perfect. She wasn't even paying attention to the fight, she was busy talking to Kakashi-sensei. Not that she had been part of this current hunt for the Uchiha anyway. He grinned wildly to himself and darted for closer trees.

Careful. Take aim. Wait for the moment to strike.

"I swear to god, Naruto, if you try anything…"

Damn it, how did she _know?_ He frowned. Oh well.

"Too late, dobe."

Naruto turned just in time to be slammed into the tree by an arm with all the weight of the Uchiha behind it.

_Call me a safe bet  
I'm betting I'm not_

"I can't believe you resorted to kicking him in the shin." Sakura sent a leveled glare at the blonde as she applied salve to a cut on Sasuke's cheek. Said blonde only grinned.

"Was worth it."

"Yeah, well, I think this game is over for today." She straightened and looked out into the rain from the shelter they'd taken under a massive tree, "I should get home, the water's getting kind of high in the lake."

"Couldn't agree more, Sakura-chan." Kakashi chirped, appearing from nowhere, his ever-present book shoved under his arm, "The town will be shutting down soon, the rain is getting to be a little too much." He glanced at the boys, "I'm sure the ramen stand will be closing soon too."

Naruto paled. Oh no. What would he do for dinner? On queue, his stomach lurched and let out a loud growl. There was a sigh from the black-haired boy and a muttered, "Usuratonkachi." that made the blonde look at Sasuke who only rolled his eyes.

Sakura rose, dusting herself off, then offered a hand to Sasuke, who blatantly ignored it and pushed himself to his feet, sending a dark look at Naruto as pain flared in his bruised shin. Sakura sighed and glanced at Kakashi, who nodded to her, "Have a good night, boys. I'll see you tomorrow!" Then darted towards the exit of the training grounds.

Kakashi didn't even try to hide his bored expression as he rubbed the back of his neck, "Stay out of trouble tonight, eh, Naruto? I'd rather not have to go hunt you down and dig you out of your hole in this weather." He popped open his side pouch and his eye crinkled as he smiled at the second book tucked safely away in it, "I have better things to do."

"Me? What about this bastard?" Naruto took up a defensive stand and pointed at Sasuke, who only looked bored.

Kakashi shrugged and closed his pouch again, "Just stay out of trouble." And then was gone.

The rain echoed through the trees, the branches rustling with the wind and the weight. Naruto listened to it for a moment, ignoring the presence that had yet to leave, before putting his hands on his hips and inhaling deeply.

"Well then," and started forward into the rain, "see you later, tem-"

A hand grabbed the back of his collar and swung him around, throwing him towards a tree and releasing a startled noise from him as he spun his weight just in time to barely brush the tree. He looked up, startled, a snarl on his lips, "What the hell was that-"

But the black-haired boy was on him again, kunai raised and aimed, he barely had a chance to dodge and draw one of his own before the sound of metal on metal joined the soft sound of rain, an explosion of sparks as Sasuke smiled and let red bleed into his eyes, "You can't possibly be out of energy yet, dobe."

"But…Ichiraku…"

"I'm not done beating the crap out of you yet."

Naruto's eyes flashed, and he rolled to avoid another charge, "Beating me? Ha! Never!"

"Always."

He frowned and dodged once more, then lifted his kunai and brought in his own attack.

From the treetops, Kakashi watched the two for a moment longer, then sighed and went to find a quiet shelter to read his book, hoping the two wouldn't kill each other.

_I'm glad you that can forgive_

_Only hoping as time goes  
You can forget  
_

The hollows of the Uchiha District rang low and long with the rain, and it all kind of weirded Naruto out. He wasn't really sure what he was doing here, following the red of the Uchiha symbol on the back of Sasuke's shirt through the darkness. The sun had gone down during their drawn-out practice, and he was worn out, hungry, and covered in dirt and blood.

The Uchiha wasn't much better off, his hair matted from the rain and a trail of blood slinking down the back of his arm. The Kyuubi piqued some interest at the scent, then settled down again at the though of rain, which was just fine with Naruto. The fight had been fun, made him remember why he liked Sasuke's companionship. Maybe that was why he'd accepted the soft invite.

He'd barely heard the others voice with the invite, between heavy pants. The quiet invitation to eat with his best friend on a cold, empty night.

He couldn't blame the others quietness in the request. Who'd want to admit to living in this silence? Especially someone as stubborn as Sasuke.

Sasuke's house loomed ahead, formal and dark, and he noticed Sasuke's pace slowed, allowing him to catch up to him. He smiled a little to himself and fell into step beside him as they made their way up the walkway, the warmth of another person making the rain seem less cold.

And when Sasuke let them in, Naruto pushed the ghosts out the door as he asked, "So what kind of Ramen do you have?"

Sasuke huffed and muttered something sounding much like, "dobe." before vanishing towards the kitchen.

Naruto kicked off his shoes and grinned to himself, before following.

_If it makes you less sad  
I'll move out of the state  
You can keep to yourself  
I'll keep out of your way_

It wasn't ramen for dinner, to Naruto's dismay, but some sort of spicy meat that burned his tongue and almost made him regret coming over. But he hadn't guessed Sasuke had a knack for making tea, and the honey-flavored one he served with dinner soothed the burn and settled the knots in his stomach.

The kitchen was quiet as they ate, and Naruto swore he'd caught Sasuke watching him. He ignored the glances and focused on the tiles bordering the kitchen, wondering what it had been like with a full family occupying the space. A full clan to fall back on.

"My father was the cook." Sasuke's dark voice broke the silence. Naruto crinkled his nose at the thought of an older Sasuke-like man in an apron running the kitchen, "He was good at it. My mother was horrible and almost burned down the house once."

Naruto let the words settle in the dimly lit space, before he ventured, "What's it like? To have a family?"

Sasuke was silent for a long time, rolling his silverware on the table, then said, "Not like this."

Lightning flashed.

Naruto knew that answer already.

He glanced up, and caught black eyes, before the thunder boomed and the lights went out.

From the shadows, he heard "Can you stay over tonight?"

_And if it makes you less sad  
I'll take your pictures all down  
Every picture you paint  
I will paint myself out_

Sasuke was a soft red glow, from the ball of chakra he'd summoned to act as a light through the dark building. Naruto trailed behind as they headed for the stairs and up to a part of the house he had never been to, his blue eyes making out the forms of frames on the walls. Some were empty, others were torn and repaired, like Sasuke had tried to keep as much of his family as he could.

Naruto smiled softly to himself, despite being unable to make out the forms in the photos, he felt almost comforted by the thought. His attention turned to the silent shadow ahead of him again. Something was off with his best friend/nemesis, but he couldn't quite figure out what. Maybe he had hit him too hard at the training field. Doubtful, but maybe.

Sasuke pushed a door open, and grunted, "Clean up, I'll find some spare clothes." Then continued down the hallway. Naruto stuck his tongue out at him, and waited while the light faded for his eyes to adjust to the darkness before daring to venture into what turned out to be a bathroom.

Well, he wasn't comfortable enough to take a shower, but he managed to find the sink and a towel and stripped himself of his shirt. He was just wiping down his stomach when there was a soft noise at the door and he turned, finding Sasuke with his ball of light and a small pile of clothes in his arms.

Sasuke was quiet for a moment, eyes unreadable, then tossed the clothes towards him, "I don't know if those will fit…you're a little fatter than me."

"Hey!" Whatever the moment was that was hiding in those shadowed eyes broke with the insult and Naruto felt a little better as he picked the fabric off the floor, and pouted, "I'm not fat, I'm just not a skinny little pole like you." He flexed an arm, "See? Muscle."

"Tche, whatever. Hurry up, dobe." And Sasuke vanished out the door again.

Naruto grinned to himself. So maybe he was making too much of this. He glanced at his dim reflection in the mirror and tugged the shirt on and quickly changed into the shorts - must have been Sasuke's fathers or something…maybe Itachi's…because they were too big for him and long, hanging past his knees.

"Ne, Sasuke?" He called out as he turned and skidded on the hardwood floors into the hallway, "They really are muscle! Wanna feel em?" He grinned and flexed both his arms at the darkness.

A door down the hall was softly glowing, so he made his way down there, when there was no reply.

_It's as cold as a tomb  
And it's dark in your room  
When I sneak to your bed  
To pour salt in your wounds_

Sasuke put out the light, and shoved the blankets on his queen-sized bed back, ignoring the elephant in the hallway's remark about his muscles. Why had he asked the blonde to stay? A little thunderstorm normally didn't bother him.

But lightning flashed, and he winced, quickly wiping it away when the blonde paraded into the room, arms still flexed. Sasuke rolled his eyes and dug out a pillow, throwing it at the blonde's face.

White teeth and the annoying grin, an imprint in his vision as the night faded back into darkness.

Why did he ask him to stay?

He sat down on his own side and blatantly ignored what the other was babbling about. Nothing useful, he knew. He watched the figure move, smirking as the shadow stumbled and fell face-first into the bed, barely missing his own knee.

"Graceful."

That grin, he didn't need lightning to know it existed.

And he knew why Naruto was there. The calm in the storm. The eye of the hurricane. The piece of mind he needed in this empty house.

The cure to his nightmares (or so he hoped)

And then he did something foolish, something he hadn't thought about or pondered on. He just…simply did it.

_So call it quits  
Or get a grip  
Say you wanted a solution  
You just wanted to be missed_

_Call me a safe bet_  
_I'm betting I'm not_

Salty, a little cold, and awkward. Not the most romantic way to describe what he was tasting. And as soon as he had done it, and realized he had done it, he retreated. He watched the shadow in the dark, the 'o' the other's lips turned into as the blonde rolled onto his stomach, then sat up.

Confusion. And panic set in. What was he doing? Naruto made a noise.

So, he leaned in and did it again.

Just to shut him up._  
_

_I'm glad that you can forgive  
I'm only hoping as time goes  
You can forget  
So you can forget  
You can forget_

Sasuke was avoiding him. He grinned to himself. It kind of sucked, since Sasuke was his main source of conversation (or sound board for him to talk to), but it was entertaining to know _why_ said raven-haired boy was avoiding him.

_You are calm and reposed  
Let your beauty unfold  
Pale white like the skin  
Stretched over your bones_

Avoided, it gave him time to observe. Most of the time, he probably wouldn't, but this...this was different. He needed to figure it out, like he was sure the raven was trying to do. It was simple, and yet oh so complex, sitting next to Sakura-chan while Kakashi rambled on about So-and-So in his stupid book, when they should have been working on stealth-strategy. Uchiha was in a tree, one leg casually draped, the other holding up his elbow, and was staring out at the forest.

The elbow in his armpit reminded him not to stare, and the blonde dragged his eyes away to a confused-looking Sakura. He simply grinned and rubbed the back of his head, then broke into Kakashi-sensei's rant by rising, "You know, Kakashi-sensei, we have better things to be doing if you aren't going to teach us anything that's going to get us into ANBU."

Kakashi blinked, then his eye drooped in disappointment, but nodded and straightened, "Well, right then..." he coughed, "I guess we'll just call it a da-"

There was a rush of wind, and the older nin blinked, looked up into the tree and frowned. Sasuke was gone.

"A day."

He frowned and the blonde was gone as well.

Sakura looked around, then settled back, smiling to herself.

"Did I miss something?"

"Probably, sensei. Probably." She uprooted a dandelion and smiled at the yellow flower fondly, "But it's all alright."

_Spring keeps you ever close  
You are second hand smoke  
You are so fragile and thin  
Standing trial for your sins_

"What do you want, baka?"

"Absolutely nothing, teme."

"Then stop following me."

"Can't."

He found them at the top of the Hokage monument. A fitting place to be, rivals for the title. An appropriate place for a show-down. Naruto was pretty proud of how 'cool' he figured he looked, with the wind whipping around him, standing down his nemesis. Answers. He wanted answers to questions he couldn't figure out. Like why Sasuke wasn't looking at him now. Wouldn't face this head-on.

The raven bowed his head, turned ever so slightly, "Don't get attached, it didn't mean anything."

He couldn't help laughing, "Right. Because you do that _all_ the time."

"Momentary weakness."

"Needing someone isn't a weakness."

"I don't need anyone."

_Right._ He didn't have to say it, and let the lie hang in the air between them.

"Ninja don't need anyone. Can't, anyway. No mortal attachments."

The blonde let him speak, watched the thin, tall figure as the sun began to fall, beginning to turn him into shadows before his eyes.

"We must be silent, we must be the night. Be smoke in the darkness, gone before it's seen."

"Are you going to go somewhere?"

"Maybe."

"Can't I go with?"

_Holding onto yourself the best you can  
You are the smell before the rain  
You are the blood in my veins_

Sasuke laughed, hollow, like the shadows in his mansion, "No attachments, Uzumaki. Too hard to let go."

"Who says you have to let go?" Naruto stepped up to stand beside him, "Maybe it'll all work out. Afterall, I'm going to be Hokage, I need someone I can trust to guard me."

Sasuke smirked, "Like you'd last ten seconds."

"Without you? Probably not."

Sasuke finally looked at him, eyes unreadable again. Not hollow, but heavy. Laden with something...and Naruto desperately wished he could figure it out. Instead, he grinned. Maybe there wouldn't be enough time, maybe he wouldn't be able to figure it out. But he knew one thing, in this moment.

So he leaned over, and did what he wanted to do.

And Sasuke didn't even try to stop him.

_Call me a safe bet  
I'm betting I'm not  
I'm glad that you can forgive  
I'm only hoping as time goes  
You can forget_

Fin.

I again apologize ..over and over and over. Hopefully this makes it up to the 250+ that have this story on follow still (boggles my mind) _


End file.
